castles → lil peep (completed)

Never Eat, Never Sleep

Chapter thirty eight

"Babe? Come on you gotta get up"

I don't care what time it is or who's currently trying to get me up, if they don't stop it I'm gonna smack a bitch. The sun belting on my face was enough to piss me off, the continuous shaking of my shoulder was pushing it.

"Em? If you don't get up, no more kisses"

I shot up, not bothering to wipe the drool off of my face. Hunny no one was gonna take Gussie's kisses away from me. I don't care who you are, all I know is that I'm awake.

"I'm up, I'm up"

He chuckled deeply and wiped not just the drool off my face but the hair away from my eyes.

"Good cause I got a little surprise for you so get dressed"

"Where even are we?"

"Jacksonville, wear something...nice"

"By nice, you mean something sexy but not too revealing so other guys won't stare at me?"

"Exactly"

"Okay, lemme get dressed"

"Love you"

Gus planted a quick kiss on the lips and ducked out of the room; giving me some privacy. I changed into a t-shirt dress and his denim jacket before putting on some vans, I hope wherever we're going isn't too fancy.

"Gus?"

"Yep?"

"Do I need to do my hair and makeup?"

"Do whatever makes you feel confident baby"

I love how he is when it comes to questions like those, but his answers are no help whatsoever. I decide to just put my hair up into a messy bun and leave it like that; I couldn't be arsed with makeup.

"You rea- woah you look great"

"Thanks baby, You look hot too. Now where are we going?"

"You'll have to wait and see"

"Urgh, why can't you just tell me?"

"Because it's a surprise"

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Gus took me to a karaoke bar, a gothic karaoke bar. Sometimes I question how he finds out about these places, a gothic karaoke bar? Are you kidding me?

"Wanna sing something?"

"Sure, What do you have in mind?"

"Anything you want"

I know exactly what I'm going to sing and I know Gus is going to love it. I went up to the DJ and whispered the song in his ear, he can have his surprises and so can I. The music started as Gus sat at the front, watching me intently as he was clearly surprised by the choice of song.

I sang the first few lines of the dark lullaby like song, drawing everyone who was listening in. It was a very slow but intense song and easy to make a bit sexual, especially when your boyfriend is only a few feet away. I look deep into his eyes as my favourite part of the song came up, this would definitely drive Gus crazy.

"Love is like a sin, my love. For the ones that feel it the most"

The more slightly erotic I acted (only enough for Gus to notice), the more his eyes flared.

"Look at her with her eyes like a flame, she will love you like a fly will never love you again"

By the time the song was over, Gus looked like he was ready to pounce on me right there and then. Honestly he's so easy to mess with, especially in public. I was going to ask him if he wanted to do a duet but I was dragged out the door before I had the chance.

"You really don't know what you're doing to me"

Just as I was about to respond, Gus pushed his lips onto mine firmly. I pushed back, proving to him I wasn't so submissive. As our kiss finished, I was left breathless as always; this boy didn't know what he did to me either.

"We should uh.....go get lunch"

"Yeah....we should"

"Where do you wanna go?"

"Somewhere lowkey but nice, what about Jason's Cafe? I heard they do  amazing pizza"

"Say no more baby, take me to the pizza"

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Gus and I barely made it to the venue in time from our day long date, we would've made it much earlier but we got stopped by some fans and he never says no to fans. The way his face lit up at the stories of how much he's helped them was so cute but I could tell his eyes told a different story. As the stories became more dark and depressing, his eyes turned darker.

As the show ended, I knew something was up. He was trying to be happy but seemed slightly irritable, like he was trying to ignore a certain thought. A thought of which concerned me.

By 3am hit, it seemed Gus was at his breaking point. It was clear he thought I was asleep when I heard him start to fall apart, what the hell happened? I moved over to him; letting him cry on my shoulder as I gripped Gus' hand and kissed it.

"Sometimes It's too much Em, these people are counting on me to keep them alive. I'm not good enough for that shit, I feel like I have to try and keep everyone alive and happy as well as keeping me head above water"

I didn't know what to say, I knew exactly what he meant but I obviously can't relate. I just layed his head onto my lap and stroked his hair as he continued to cry.

Gus had his demons, and he was going to beat them. I was not going to let him loose, not on my watch.

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The song Em sang :
Paradise Circus by Massive Attack