castles → lil peep (completed)

Come Around

Chapter forty one

Five months had past since Gus gave me my promise ring on stage and we were on his 'come over when your sober' international tour. That's right, international. I'm so proud of him, Gus works harder than anyone and deserves this. So many shows were sold out and he alway gave it his all, even if he was doped up every show.

What can I say? I was always drugged up too.

We had just arrived in Arizona from El Paso and I could sense something was different. It was only 1am and I somehow knew today was going to be.......I don't know.

"What's up baby? You seem tense"

"It's barely today and I already have a feeling today's going to be bad"

"Don't be silly, silly"

"Come on Gus, you know I'm never wrong about these things"

"Just stop pacing and get in bed babe, you've been under some stress lately"

I obliged and changed into a light pink hoodie and matching thong, cuddling into him as he wrapped his arms around me. I breathed in his comforting scent, feeling some of my anxiety calm down; not all of it though.

"Something bad's gonna happen later Gussie, and I'm scared"

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The second I woke up to Gus' kisses, the horrible paranoia like feeling had increased since when we went to bed. From the look on his face I could tell he saw how nervous I looked and gave me a gentle peck on the lips.

"You still feeling tense huh?"

"Yeah, i hope it's nothing"

"It probably is, today's gonna be a good day"

"I like your hair like this, have I ever told you that?"

"All the time, I'm glad you do. I was kinda worried you wouldn't like it this short"

"Baby, you look cute with any hairstyle"

"Okie let's get up, I wanna shower with you"

I giggled and went to the shower room with him, maybe today wouldn't be so bad?

I had changed into a pair of black short shorts (Gus picked them out) and his angry girl hoodie but he was still in our room. I made my usual coffee and took my usual xan before sitting down and turning on Fresh Prince Of Bell Air. Gus would be in soon.

As one episode turned into three and just myself turned into me, Goth, T, Horse, Fish and Coldy. During the commercial break I could hear a light argument from the bunks, all I knew is that by the time the show came back on, Mackned joined us too.

The fourth episode soon became the eighth and I could feel my anxiety start to bubble up again. It had been hours and Gus was still not out yet; I was about to get up when Bexey came into the room laughing.

"What's up Bex?"

"Peep said he was working on his muscles but when I went in there, he was totally passed out asleep"

He continued to laugh as my eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Asleep? After what we did in the shower I know he was wide awake, the whole thing makes no sense.

I got up and headed to he bunk area where I saw him passed out; he wasn't asleep. I can see why Bex would think he was snoozing, easy mistake to make if you haven't experienced what I have.

"Oh my god call an ambulance!"

"Why what's wrong?"

"Bex, What you heard wasn't a snore, it was a death rattle now call an ambulance!"

"Death rattle? That's insane"

I understood why they had questions and it must be so confusing for them but I couldn't answer; sobs were starting to choke me. I checked Gus' face ;eyes in the back of his head and saliva falling out of his mouth. What happened to him?

While I was told the paramedics were on their way, I shoved my fingers down his throat. This doesn't happen out of thin air and I had a feeling drugs had something to do with it. I was trying to stay calm because I knew that if I let myself break down it would not be good for anyone.

As the ambulance crew burst in, I had only managed to get him to throw up a few xans but Gus was still unconscious. Once I saw there was nothing else I could do other than pray he would live, I let the tears fall and my heart break. Goth came up behind me and hugged me, trying not to fall apart himself.

This better be a fucking nightmare.

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November 15th, the day i knew would end in disaster and I was right. I sat outside Gus' hospital room, scared that he was going to die. I didn't want to consider it but I knew it was a possibility; a fucking scary possibility which despite of I still managed to remain somewhat calm.

It was probably shock.

"Gustav Åhr?"

I hopped up; being surprisingly optimistic but still bracing myself for the worst. With my shaking hands and shallow breaths, I tried not to feel faint as the doctor's face fell as he looked at his clipboard.

"Miss, the good news is that Mr Åhr will be completely fine and will make a full recovery"

My baby was going to be okay

"The bad news is that it seemed the cause of unconsciousness is an overdose of Fentanyl"

I was stunned. I knew we popped Xanax a bit too much but it was always the legit stuff, none of this pressed shit. The tears welled up again as I slid down the wall, fentanyl is some serious stuff. I couldn't help but think what would've happened if I hadn't have checked on Gus.

"We've had to put him into a medical induced coma to ensure no further damage is inflicted"

"W-w-when will he wake up?"

"Within a week or so"

"Oh"

I texted Goth, telling him everything I was told and that he should notify Emma, Liza and Oskar; I would do it myself but I don't think I could without breaking down all over again. I just needed to calm down for a while before I go in there and see him; I needed to breathe. Six hours ago we were together showering but now Gus' in the hospital because he almost died.

I hope he'll come around soon