castles → lil peep (completed)

Ghost Girl

Chapter Seven

"What?...How?....When?"

"I tracked your phone here, I would've done it earlier but you've been on the move"

"You're sick! You're one sick bastard and I want you to leave me alone"

"Oh darling, how many times do I have to tell you? You belong to me. You do what I say, when I say"

"Please just go, I've done everything you've said for four years"

"Do I look like I give a shit? Let me spell it out for you : you're mine"

He leapt onto my hospital bed and clamped my mouth shut as I was about to scream; I thrashed as hard  as I could but the pain and torment was too overwhelming. He punched me square in the face, blurring my vision as I felt him reach up my hospital gown and shoved two fingers in.

I screamed against his hand not because I hoped someone would hear but because I needed to. I knew what was happening and that I couldn't do anything about it. I just prayed someone would come in.

He retreated his fingers once he was satisfied and went to unbuckled his belt when I heard a low growl as he was literally thrown off me and into the opposite wall.

I didn't see who it was who saved me because I already knew and I would rather lay here and cry silently then face him. That could wait until I was ready. I was scared of what he would say, scared of what anyone would say once they found out....if they were to find out.

My IVs were ripped out of my arm quickly but carefully and I was pulled into someones arms as they carried me across the hospital with security, nurses and police officers running by every once in a while. Did I pay attention? No. Why? Because I knew what was happening as it wasn't the first time it had happened.

I just stared at the ceiling; wishing it was the night sky so I could get lost in the stars. The voices and general background noise blended into one as my mind took over. It consumed my entire being; one sentence repeating over and over :

I deserve this.

It filled my head to the point where I didn't notice Gus (who had sat me down on the couch in the bus) was in front of me, slighting crying, trying to get my attention. He was even shaking and screaming at me but I couldn't hear him, just my mind. I could only observe him.

He was scared and frustrated; pulling at his hair. I could tell he was sober which meant he was most definitely stressed to the limit on top of everything that's just happened. It was lucky because soon the police would be here to question us.

Slowly, I came out of my mind and my awareness melted away as I was thrown back into the real world.  Somewhere I used to hate to be. Gustav changed that for me.

"Do I look like I know what's going on with her? It's like she's in a fucking coma and I'm freaking the fuck out! It's like she's some sort of fucking ghost girl!"

I could hear him screaming at someone about me and I could see him not pulling, ripping, his hair out. He even sounded on the verge of a mental breakdown and it was all my fault. I wanted this to end. I needed this to end.

"Gus"

No one heard me but I didn't have the strength to scream.

"Gus!"

He immediately stopped and turned around, looking like a deer in the headlights. He dashed over and crouched down in front of me; holding my hands in a comforting manor. Instead of crying out of frustration , it looked like he was going to start sobbing out of relief.

"I'm so sorry Gussie"

Nothing needed to be said, he just held me as he sat on the floor; sobbing along with me. I was still petrified but I felt safe with him.

I needed him, even if it would only ever be friends.