Fragile World

Chapter 52

Flashback

After meeting Clary, Jace, Izzy and Simon at Java Jones, boys walked back home without car, so they could be alone and take a walk. None of them were saying anything and that comfortable silence was the best thing they could've asked for after yesterday. Even though Alec and Magnus knew they could tell each other everything, they still weren't saying anything about that horrible day. Maybe, they hadn't realized that it had really happened.

They walked to Magnus's house. He was alone today because Julia had lot of work to do, so she wouldn't return to home till morning. She hated that she had to leave her son alone after what happened, but Magnus convinced her that he wouldn't be alone and Alec would be with him.

Magnus opened the door and they walked inside. They were still silent. Without saying anything, they went to the living room and set down on the sofa. Alec was looking at the TV, even though it was off. Magnus used the moment to look at Alec and to realize how handsome the boy in front of him was. Messy raven hair, beautiful hazel eyes, his ridiculously thick eyelashes and his lips... He was irresistible.

-Why are you staring at me? That's creepy...-Alec broke the silence and looked at Magnus with smile on his face. Magnus looked down and blushed.-You are cute, but you're getting way more cuter when you blush. Another reason why I love you so much.

-What scared you the most when you were stuck in the choir room?-Magnus asked out of the blue and looked into Alec's eyes, who sighed and placed his hand on Magnus's cheek.

-The thought that I might've lost you... It drove me crazy. I don't want to lose you, Magnus. Not now, not ever. I want you to be by my side forever. Till the day I die...

-And I will be with you after that too.-Magnus whispered and tears filled his eyes. Suddenly, without realizing, his mind started imagining Jonathan shooting Alec in front of him. Alec bleeding on the school floor and Magnus, not being able to do anything, sitting beside him, his hands covered in blood and yelling for help, while telling Alec that everything would be okay. Alec smiling for the last time and slowly closing his eyes and becoming paler.

Suddenly, Magnus felt like he couldn't breathe anymore. The room was getting smaller and smaller and Magnus wasn't able to take air. Alec noticed how Magnus's breathe got fast.

-Magnus, what's wrong?! Hey, hey, look at me!-Alec said and cupped Magnus's face in his hands. Now, tears escaped from his eyes and Alec started to get more and more nervous.

-I... I ca... can't brea... breathe.-Magnus choked out those words and Alec realized that Magnus was having a panic attack, because Izzy once had it back in New York when Maryse told her that they were moving to Ohio. Alec got closer to Magnus and looked into his eyes.

-Hey, Magnus, hey! Look into my eyes and breathe.-Alec said with shaky voice. Magnus said "I can't" with low voice.-Yes, yes you can! Come on, three seconds in and three seconds out.

Alec begged and saw panic in those beautiful brown eyes he loved so much. After a few minutes of slowly breathing in and out, Magnus managed to calm down his breathing.

-Thank you.-He whispered and hugged Alec. Alec breathed in relief when he realized that Magnus was okay. Magnus said something again and hid his face in Alec's neck.

-No need to thank me, I love you.-Alec said and broke the hug, but only to look into Manus's eyes again.-What happened? Why did you get so scared?

-Alec... We really don't have to talk about it. I'm fine...-Magnus said with convincing voice but Alec shook his head and took Magnus's hands.

-No, no you're not. You're scared and I hate when you're scared! Tell me what where you thinking about...-Alec said and Magnus sighed.

-Suddenly, I saw you, lying on the school floor, bleeding and I couldn't do anything. Then you closed your eyes... It was terrifying. I don't want to lose you, I...-Before Magnus could finish the sentence, Alec cupped his face and pressed his lips on Magnus's. This one soft kiss was enough to bring tears back in Magnus's eyes.-I'm broken. This accident broke me, Alexander...

-No. No, you are not broken. You're the strongest person I know. You're strong, kind, caring, sweet... hot. That's why I love you. That's why I fell in love with you, Magnus.

-I love you, I always will...-Magnus said. They lied down on the sofa, hugged and fell asleep.