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25. March 2019.

 Now I understand, everything is clear now but what I said before in the previous entry is a bit much, I can exaggerate sometimes but not all the time.

I got to the gym a little bit earlier, thankfully it's not that far from me. As I started to change girls kept coming in, there were so many that they occupied every single gear for warming up, thankfully my bike was available. I was going towards it when Will approached me to say hi and told me to do fifteen minutes. After warming up I moved to the mat, I came to them but the next thing was not what I expected. He was sitting and the way we said 'hey' to each other was incredible, maybe it's stupid to anyone else but for me it was incredible and at the moment I couldn't be mad at him. So, what happened there? I looked at him and without any words, we gave each other a look, a look that is saying everything, it was just a mimic, the way we did it. It felt like it was a secret handshake, it felt like it was a secret that only we know. It was also like two friends who know each other for a very long time where the words are unnecessary and that we can talk with our eyes only. It was amazing and I also felt important, significant. While we were doing exercises he told us how he's trying to make a cover for his book, he wants to be him on the cover. The idea was born. I was thinking that maybe I can do it. I would want to make a cover and then I said. "You can think of the scenery you want and I'll take your photo." "Yes! That's perfect." I can't believe he said yes to this idea and then my mind went ahead seeing his cover and inside my name as a photographer. It's a great idea, I can't wait to be a part of this. I hope he meant it. Later after a little while, a little girl came, she's super cute. As I got to him he pulled me away from her, he thought I had something private to ask him so he leaned in but I didn't have, I wish I had. I asked if the time for Wednesday is the same but then he started telling me how he was driven here by his friend, how there was an accident on the road and now after this training, he's running to another. "Yes, it's the same time. I'll see you and in the morning we're gonna talk." Right here I saw how busy he is, how he can barely find the time for himself and there is me complaining how he doesn't want to be with me. I am so selfish, I don't believe how selfish I can be. It's time for me to give him some time, not to smother him and to be pushy. No wonder he's single.

When I got to him and that little girl, he was so cute. "She's going to be your coach." Will was telling her about me. "Say hi to her." Will was telling me. We were both doing our exercises but then he had to leave for a minute and when he came back he asked me if she was doing everything that he told her to do and I said that she did. "Oh, wow, they teamed up against me." He knew that I was lying but she's just a kid, she needs to be supervised all the time but then come to think about I didn't like doing exercises at that age or any age.