All The Mixed Feelings (Van McCann)

Part 39

Van

It almost seemed like a dream lying naked and spent in each other's arms.

Except only one of you is spent, a mocking voice said in my head. Fuck, what was wrong with me? I'd wanted this for so long, the anticipation had been killing me. And now I'd had my chance and had blown it, quite literally. I'd barely even got her warmed up.

Abby hadn't seemed bothered, but she wouldn't be likely to tell me about it if she was, would she? She was too nice for that.

I stole a glance at her whilst her eyes were elsewhere. She was so beautiful, her pale skin still slightly flushed from our encounter and her luscious full lips. Those cute little dimples that popped on her cheeks whenever she smiled, which she was doing right now as she looked up at me.

"What?" She said coyly. "You're looking at me funny!"

"I'm just thinking how lucky I am to be here right now with you," I replied, and I meant it. Luckiest guy on the planet I reckoned.

She giggled, never one to take a compliment readily. "You must be easily pleased."

I rolled my eyes dramatically for show. "Yeah, I'm not fussy to be fair," I laughed cheekily.

This comment earned me a slap across the chest and I retaliated, tickling her sides until she squealed.

"You can sleep in the wet patch for that comment!" She giggled once we'd settled down and she'd nestled into me again, her head on my shoulder.

We lay together, so close and comfortable, our bodies fitting together like the most natural jigsaw puzzle. We chatted about my plans for the next day, but instead of feeling excited about embarking on the great adventure that lay before me, anxiety was starting to gnaw at me. How would we leave things? What would this encounter mean when days stretched into weeks and then months and I'd not seen her?

Gradually Abby's voice got quieter and her replies shorter, and then a little yawn escaped her, although she tried to hide it with her hand.

"Am I boring you?" I chuckled.

"No, no!" She hurriedly replied. "I'm just knackered that's all. Bet you are too?"

"Yeah," I lied. "Maybe we should get some sleep, huh?"

The truth was I felt wired. I'd always struggled to sleep and managed on much less than most people. I didn't find it easy to relax, I had boundless energy and countless thoughts constantly running through my head. I could have easily stayed up all night with Abby, chatting, getting to know all about her, maybe we'd fuck again. Next time I'd take my time with her... if there was a next time.

I shifted slightly so I could look down at her. Her eyes were closed now and her breathing was slowing. How could she possibly have fallen asleep so quickly? I carefully moved my arm so her head lay on the pillow and she stirred slightly. I planted a little kiss on her forehead and closed my eyes.

* * * * *

Sunlight was streaming into the room the next time I opened my eyes and I felt disorientated for a moment. Waking up in unfamiliar hotels was still a novelty for me and I wondered if at some point in the future I would get used to it.

I felt movement next to me and a soft sigh. Abby!

The memories of the previous night flashed through my head as I turned to see her sleeping form beside me. Her pale skin looked almost luminous as the sunlight filtering through the blinds caressed her delicate curves. Her long brown hair tumbled across the pillow and her expression was serene. She was perfection.