All The Mixed Feelings (Van McCann)

Part 41

Abby

I knew I looked pretty ridiculous for 10am in the morning, tottering across the hotel reception in my sky-scraper heels and Van's t-shirt slung on over my sparkly dress, but I'd told him I'd go and meet him. I didn't want to let him down after the way his eyes had looked so hopeful before he'd left. Nerves were twisting in my stomach, I'd only seen Johnny last night and very briefly. What would the others say? I was all too conscious of the dark bruise that stained my cheek and my disheveled appearance.

I spotted them as soon as I entered the hotel restaurant, and was thankful to spot Michelle sitting with the group. They were all there, with a man I didn't recognise who I presumed was the manager. Van had his back to me as I approached. The manager didn't look happy. He was looking around the group, talking in a raised voice.

I strained to hear as I got closer, then had the urge to turn and walk right back where I'd come from. "As for you Van, think you can manage to keep it in your pants for more than five minutes? Next thing you know, you'll be getting some poor girl knocked up and then you can kiss goodbye to the fame and fortune you're after!"

I felt like I'd been winded and stopped in my tracks. Had they all been discussing... us?

I imagined a scenario in my head where Van was boasting about his conquest to his band-mates and my chest felt tight. I wanted to disappear without having been seen but as I turned I saw Van twisting round in his seat. I could hear footsteps pounding towards me as I started to head back for reception.

"Abby!" Michelle's voice made me slow my pace, but I didn't look back. Within a few seconds she'd caught me up and stood, barring my way. "What's up? Where are you going?"

I glanced backwards, a mixture of relief but also disappointment that Van hadn't made an appearance.

"What was all that about?" I gestured towards the restaurant.

"Dan's giving the lads a hard time. I mean they were a bloody nightmare last night, but it was funny too!" Michelle looked amused, but then her expression changed when she caught me frowning. "Hey, are you ok?"

"I don't think I'm hungry after all..."

Michelle linked her arm through mine, trying to steer me back towards the restaurant. I resisted, and she looked at me quizzically. "Don't you at least want to get a cuppa?"

"I think I'll skip it. I'm just going to go back to the room..." I started, pulling away from her.

Michelle was eyeing me suspiciously. She stepped forward and pushed my hair back, tucking it behind my ear, and I heard her inhale deeply.

"I know it looks bad, but it doesn't hurt too much," I lied, reaching up to move my hair forward and cover my bruised face.

Michelle had both hands on my shoulders now, and she was looking at me right in the eye. "Abby, you don't need to hide. Everyone here's a friend."

"Yeah friendly enough that they've probably all been talking about what me and Van got up to last night by the sounds of things!"

"Don't take it the wrong way. Bob says Dave's just stressed at the moment about the tour plans and taking it out on the lads. It's a big deal for the band. As for you and Van... knowing him he probably came down here this morning like he'd scored the winning goal in the Euros!"

Michelle nudged me then, and I couldn't help but smile as a silly image popped into my head of Van doing some sort of daft goal celebration in the middle of the restaurant. Maybe I was taking things too seriously. I knew how close the guys were, but nevertheless I still felt even more self-conscious about facing the rest of the band with the knowledge that they all knew that we'd hooked up last night.