Not Just A Fan - Josh Hutcherson

Chapter 78

Josh's POV.

Pain.

That's the only thing that I know that's real in this world. We constantly get our hearts broken, that's a given fact. I never knew real pain before her.

"Josh, this is getting really annoying! Get up and do something with your life before I jump on you and literally crush you to death!"

"I dare you do try."

"Dude, I stored up all winter for this moment."

This was basically how it went with me and Jen for the past two weeks.

Two weeks since I broke it off with her. Two weeks since I ruined my only chance of happiness. Two weeks since my whole world started spinning into darkness. I can't help but wonder if she's moved on. Am I selfish to want her back? God, I miss her so much. But what if she's already found someone to replace me?

"Leave me alone," I mumble into my pillow as I pull the covers over my head.

"I'm sick and tired of you acting like you don't give a damn about Emma when it's clearly breaking you. Get up and do something about it! This whole mess isnt going to clean itself up if you two are two stubborn too talk! God, Josh I really want to slap you 99.9% of the time." Jennifer punches my side. I let out a throaty groan as I roll over on my stomach.

Suddenly I feel a weight crashing down on my back.

"Ow! Holy crap Jen! You weigh a ton!"

"Told you." I can almost hear her smirk.

Truth is, I miss her. With every waking minute I feel sick and the only person that could nurse me back to health is the person I don't have. Because I'm an idiot and don't get girls. I was tempted to text her, I really was. But I didn't want to admit that I was in the wrong. I just really want to hold her, and kiss her, and hug her, and tell her how much she means to me.

"Text her," Jen's voice softens, "Do the whole world a favor and text the poor girl."

I feel her weight lift off of my and turn around to see her handing me my phone. I take it hesitantly and try to write out a message that could capture how I felt.

Emma, I can't explain to you how much I miss you and how much of an idiot I am. You probably know I'm an idiot but I'm just not good at this stuff. I love you, Emma. And I've tried seeing a future past us but I just can't. I love you so much that I'm losing my mind. Please Emma, just text me back and tell me that we're okay, that we'll always find a way back to each other. Tell me that there's some hope. I need to hear from you or I'll lose it. If you don't reply back I'll understand, I'll leave you alone. But please just consider it. I love you.

"See? That wasn't so bad was it?" Jennifer ruffles my hair and I give her an appreciating smile.

"I'm lucky to have you, Jen."

"I know."

I let out a deep sigh as I roll over and throw the pillow back on my head.

Please, text me back Emma. Please.

Emma's POV.

All my life, I felt that I never fit in. I was always that one girl who was too shy to speak for herself, too shy to commit to anyone. That's before Josh came along. He brought a sense a light to my life that I didn't know was possible. But in that light, I knew there was darkness, lurking, ready to jump in and ruin it all. And here I was, in that darkness. My source of light was gone.