Deepest Desire

31- Voices

~ Sebastian~

Moments became days, days became weeks and before I knew it, another month passed in spur of moments, flashing quickly. Things were calming but for my own betterment, I avoided Eileen this whole month.

"Yet how could you choose your own lover to break?!"

You are not my lover. You are not my lover. You never were, you never will be.

I don't want to entangle with this woman only to become who I never was. I cannot allow her to disrupt my functions. If she dared to become my malady, I would kill her.

I won't let her ruin me. I won't be like Alphonse, Nathaniel, Sufiyan and every second person I know who devastated himself by feelings.

"My terror is far greater than my love for you, Sebastian Stellios."

You should fear me. That is exactly why I married you, to eat your fear for my tranquility.

All this month, I tried to maintain my distance so I could gather my posture and become who I was. To take things back to how they started. I have no intentions of developing a relationship with her.

I go to work early, come home late, I didn't go to the appointment with her either. I totally shut myself from her for a whole month and I bet this would only be a blessing to her.

"Everything's okay, Boss?" Dave asked after we were done with some work.

"Yeah..." I trailed off, rubbing my temples, closing my eyes to not think about it but then I realized all this month this was all I have thought about- Her.

"You are also the man I fell in love with, Asshole!"

"Fuck!" Cursing, I slammed my hand down, walking back to my cabin to rest my mind and focus on work.

I can't let this happen, I don't want to hear her voice. I don't.

"Boss..?" Jacob called entering the cabin but was taken aback to see me frustrated without a reason but I don't want to display my disturbance moreover to tell them it's because of a woman.

"What?" Growling, I asked angrily, taking a seat to shift my mind and not pay attention to my affliction and began to work on a file.

"Are you going to Jake's Party? You know he was going to flex his success there or should we handle it?" Jacob asked hesitantly, glancing at Dave to ask what happened but I glared at him to not seek further reason for me to take my anger out on him.

"No, I don't have time for a paltry party. Take your girlfriend and attend it in my stead. " I muttered, rolling my eyes. Using this party as an excuse to pull Jake down and remind him of his position.

Yeah, he is my business rival, always bragging about his sales and success but I have two things to handle at one time or else how else am I far more superior than him?

"Okay..." He hummed and left immediately, not wanting to enrage me by stupid questions further.

With a snarl, I was working on the file until Dave's voice came vaguely, "Did you.. Have a fight with Madam, Boss?"

I stopped for a second, narrowing my eyes in pure ire at him to not ask or else he will regret it.

"Sorry," Speaking immediately, he left, leaving me all alone in my thoughts. Exhaling my distress, I ignored his question, I shook my head, focusing on the work.

Until my phone rang and the man I hate the most, whose face I don't want to see. Who burns my soul- Asad called.

My jaw clenched, utterly infuriated because if he was calling it would be something which would ravage my mood.