Before I Forget

The Very Hungry Caterpillar

This chapter contains some very detailed and disturbing violence. Be warned.

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Cody Bishop was anything but a quitter.

From the moment of his birth, he had had to fight for everything. A miracle, they had called it, the fact that he had even survived the first night of his life. But Cody knew better. It hadn't been a miracle, it had been no Heavenly grace, no fate. It was the fact that he was a fighter. He had simply refused to give up, and that's how it had been ever since.

So was one broken heart gonna bring him down?

Hell, no.

He wasn't going to give up, not this easily, no matter how much he was hurting.

Hearing Sky's words - I love you too, Eli - had caused more pain than anything in a very long time, and for the first time in years, Cody had cried. But those midnight hours when he had silently shed his tears, lying alone on the living room couch, had done nothing to kill the love in his heart, to kill the hope that maybe—

Maybe she doesn't love me yet. But that doesn't mean she'll never love me. I'm not going to just give up.

He was in the boys' bathroom, and while washing his hands, he looked at his reflection in the mirror. He had chosen the same burgundy hoodie he had worn that day when he had taken Sky to have milkshakes because he had a hunch she liked how he looked wearing it. And it was important to look good, because today, he was going to ask her out.

Just as friends, sure. She was still in love with someone else. But he could still take her to the movies, right? Or maybe a visit to the bookstore—

And then, maybe, she would kiss him again. Because even if she wasn't in love with him, she sure seemed to be in love with his body, with his lips, and for now, that was okay too. Cody would take any small thing she was willing to give him, anything that would help to satisfy this hunger inside of him, this yearning for love that occupied his every thought.

He had seen her in the cafeteria at lunch, and by God, the sight of her had knocked the air out of his lungs. The tiny pink skirt, the cropped white hoodie, the way her hair fell to her shoulders, and how she ran her fingers through it when she laughed—

The sound of her laughter had made him weak in the knees. He still felt dizzy, just remembering it made him short of breath.

He'd had no idea that falling in love with someone would feel like this. That it would be this all-consuming, like a fire inside of his soul. He hadn't known it would really feel like in the books and the movies, like someone had put a spell on him, like the very world around him had changed so that not even the molecules of the air were the same as before.

He even welcomed the excruciating pain this love caused, because it proved he did have a heart, that he could fall in love, that there was something good and beautiful inside of him after all, and not only darkness.

The bathroom door opened, startling him back into the moment. For how long had he been staring into the mirror, thinking about Sky? He let out a strained laugh, was just about to turn and leave when he recognized the people who had entered.

Slowly he turned around and straightened his back.

There was Hawk - his face still bruised after their fight, the cuts on his neck were still covered under band-aids - and he had murder in his eyes. He walked in, followed by his gang, four other guys of whom Cody only recognized one - Kyler Park.