Pitch Perfect Harmony

Missing Him

After the last show in Warsaw, Taylor fell to bed exhausted. She really missed Travis and that made all of this more tiring than ever. Especially now, when she just came back from a concert and noone was waiting for her, she felt lonely. It was so empty and cold in her room. Travis didn't have time for a call after her show later and it usually didn't bother her because they had talked before the show and he sent the sweetest text messages too but for some reason, tonight was harder. His shirt had arrived in time for the first show and she had been wearing it every night to sleep, so she hid in it again and tried to swallow the loneliness. She wanted to sleep but her head was spinning. Vienna was up next and it was a four-day break before. She just wanted to be there already, then get to London and finish the European leg before going home.

After about an hour of not being able to sleep, her head began to play games with her. She knew that but it was still hard to push the thoughts away. What if Travis didn't have an appointment and he just didn't want to talk to her? Maybe he was tired of her calls and how much she depended on his caring words. Maybe he didn't miss her at all and he just said it for her. Taylor turned onto her back and stared at the ceiling holding back tears. She didn't know why she was about to cry and she felt so stupid for it. Why couldn't she just do her work, play her tour, and go home without crying about missing Travis? She was an adult now. This shouldn't phase her so much. But it did. She broke down tonight and didn't get much sleep. When she finally drifted off, she dreamed of a lonely street. There was noone but her. Until she looked up and saw all the people in their windows watching her. They didn't move or talk. It was dead silent but they were all looking at her.

Suddenly, she noticed Travis in the distance. Turned away from her, he was walking in the same direction. Taylor immediately tried to catch up but the closer she got the more transparent he seemed and when she was about to touch him, because he didn't react to her voice, he vanished. Her eyes flicked open and she quickly put a light on. Wiping a few stray tears away, she sat up slowly. It was just a dream. He wouldn't disappear. In a few weeks, she would come home and he'd be there. Taylor tried to tell herself that over and over but in the end, she took her phone. It was late evening for him and he'd most likely be asleep already. But Taylor could not find sleep again. She felt her heart still pounding heavily. Anxiety controlling her body, she called him. It didn't take long for him to pick up. "Tay? Is everything okay?", he asked sleepily. "I... yeah, I just... I needed to hear your voice. Did I wake you up? I'm sorry, it was just... it's nothing, go back to sleep", she mumbled and was about to end the call but he didn't let her. "Wait! It's like four am or something for you, so I'm sure it's not nothing. What's going on?", he asked. After the last few days with the attack in London and Kanye's single dropping, he wasn't too surprised that she couldn't sleep.

"I just had a bad dream. I really just needed to hear your voice. I'm okay now", she assured him but he didn't let go. "Okay, I'm here now. Why did you have a bad dream? What's bothering you?", he questioned making her sigh. "I... I miss you so much", Taylor silently admitted embarrassed. "Oh, baby, I miss you too. So, so much. So did you have a bad dream about me?", he wanted to know. Travis had expected to hear about what was going on in England since the attack or that Kanye mentioning her wasn't as easy to shake off as she had thought. But this seemed to be just about them. "You vanished", she told him silently. "And everyone was just watching and I was... alone and... it was just scary. I didn't need to wake you up for this, sorry", she apologized again. "Tay, it's not a problem. You can always call me when you're scared. Even if it's irrational, I don't care. I'm here, okay? I always am", he said calmly. "I wish I could hug you", he added after a few seconds of silence. "I could really need a hug", Taylor answered. "You also need sleep, don't you?", he asked looking at the clock again. "Probably. It's... early", she mumbled not willing to look at the time. "I'm in bed too. Do you want to stay on the phone? You can hang up when you wake up in a few hours, how does that sound?", he suggested. "Sounds good", she agreed, so they put the lights out but still left the call open to fall asleep together.