Pitch Perfect Harmony

I Don't Want You Here

Finally, on her way to London, Taylor still had this oppressive feeling in her stomach. She didn't feel safe at all. Not even high up in the air. Multiple times, she started crying and had to control her hyperventilation. She didn't want to go to London. Taylor wanted to go home. And home was where Travis was. She knew he'd come over if she just asked but pulling him away from training camp was something she didn't want to be held responsible for. Tree suggested asking Andrea and Scott to come over for the last London shows instead and after a few minutes of contemplating her options, Taylor agreed.

Landing in London, their stress level rose again. The walks from hotel to car and car to plane had been nerve-wracking for everyone flanked by security more than ever. And as far away as Vienna was now, it still felt dangerous. Taylor concentrated on breathing in and out while staring at the floor and letting her team guide her to the car. She immediately broke down inside of it. Crying hurt at this point. Her throat was sore, her cheeks dry, and her eyes red. Tree had suggested strongly to acompany her at her place but Taylor didn't want to have her there. She didn't want anyone there. Now, she regretted her decision. She didn't even remember how she got to her living room but somehow she ended up there breaking down over and over. There were still so many people in Vienna. They had just wanted to see her shows, had planned this trip for months, had put together outfits, made bracelets, begged their parents or partners to be able to go, and so much more. Now, they were probably all mad at her and also in danger. There were still suspects uncaught. Someone had planned to hurt them. To kill them. At her concert.

Travis called when he got a short message from Tree about the arrival in London. He was confused as to why Taylor didn't call him and it worried him too. But she picked up at least, for the first time in forever declining FaceTime though. "Tay?", he just asked when she didn't say anything. She tried so hard to pull herself together not wanting him to be worried but a gasp escaped her and her tears were still running. "Baby, please say something. I know you feel terrible. You don't have to pretend that you're okay", he tried to assure her. "I... I wanna go home", she mumbled managing to hold loud sobs in at least. "I know, Tay. But you are safe now, okay? You're in London and I'm sure everything will be okay soon. Do you want me to come?", he asked feeling his heart ache for her. He wanted to hold her close, to calm her shaking body down, and kiss her good night. "No! No, you stay where you are!", she protested immediately.

"Allie, I'm worried for you. I want to be there", he said. "Trav, please! Please, don't come here. I don't want you away from training camp", she begged him. "But I...", he tried again but she didn't let him. "No! Please, Trav. I can't fight with you now. Just... just stay. Mom and Dad are coming tomorrow", she told him exhausted. Travis sighed still not quite convinced. "I don't want to fight with you either, Tay. Just promise to tell me if you do need me? Nothing is more important than being there for each other, okay? I'll be okay without training camp but not without you", he wanted her to know. "O-okay. But... but I think I'll be okay with Mom and Dad tomorrow. You don't need to come", she said silently. "Okay. But I'll stay on the phone with you and when we talk tomorrow, you tell me honestly if you want me to come", he suggested. Taylor nodded forgetting that he couldn't see that. "Okay?", he asked. "Yeah... I'm tired", she admitted. "I bet. Go to bed, hm? I'll stay on the phone until you're asleep and if you wake up from thoughts or bad dreams, you call me", he said. She agreed with a silent noise.

But Taylor couldn't sleep. She was barely able to close her eyes without immediately feeling anxiety bubbling up in her chest tightening around her lounges. Travis hated that he couldn't just hug her, whisper sweet nothings to her, and kiss her head. He ended up talking her through the whole night. At some point, Taylor didn't even try to sleep anymore. She sat up again and talked with Travis about everything. Unimportant nonsense but also what was going on and how she felt. He listened, reassured her as much as he could, and had a hard time not asking if he should come to London again. She was very clear earlier and he didn't want to get into a fight about it. But he insisted on staying on the phone until Andrea would arrive. That took another couple of hours and he missed parts of his training but Taylor didn't even put that together. She was just exhausted. Tired, scared, and sad.

Even after Andrea and Scott arrived and he could see them hugging through her phone camera, it was hard to end the call. Watching his girl break down again wasn't easier to see just because her parents were there too. Andrea assured him that she'd take care of Taylor and then he really had to go. Tree also came over again around noon updating Taylor on everything. She chose her words carefully and managed to avoid any major breakdowns. But it felt wrong to not address the situation for Taylor. She wasn't allowed to say anything publicly until the authorities would allow it. Tree even thought it would be safer to stay silent until the rest of the European shows were over safely.

After a few thought spirals about it, Taylor was on Tree's side though. She wouldn't want to put anyone in danger at the London shows. Right now, she wasn't even sure how she should be able to get on stage again in a few days. And now that she knew she wouldn't say anything about Vienna for another two weeks, she was a little scared of how people would react to that too. But Andrea and Scott were at least able to take care of her enough that she could sleep for a while. Andrea made sure Taylor ate something and Scott stayed in contact with Tree and the rest of the business team for Taylor. Besides falling asleep on the couch with Taylor leaning on his shoulder sleeping as well. Andrea didn't want to wake them, so she put a blanket around them before sending Travis a picture. "I think she's doing better. We'll bring her home safely in a few days", she assured him making him smile a little when he read it later. Travis immediately thanked her for the update and for taking care of her. He couldn't help but apologize for not being there too but Andrea wouldn't hold that against him. She knew Taylor didn't want him to abandon everything for her.