Pitch Perfect Harmony

Crumbling Down

Taylor woke up about two hours after Travis had left for Kansas. She was still tired and overall exhausted from the last few weeks in South America but being home felt good. Reaching over to the other side of the bed, she remembered that Travis had left already. Sighing, Taylor sat up in bed. As if she had called her, Andrea slowly opened the door. "Good morning honey. How are you?", she asked sitting down on the side of the bed. "I don't know. Honestly, I just feel... everything and nothing at the same time and I don't even really know why", Taylor explained. "You have some time now to figure things out, hm? Would you like some breakfast?", she suggested. Her daughter nodded, so they stood up and walked over to the kitchen.

"I think it was really nice that Travis came to pick you up from the airport", Andrea mentioned while Taylor ate her breakfast. She instantly smiled softly at the thought of him waiting for her in the car. "He's cute for doing that. I missed him a lot", she admitted. "He seemed pretty worried when he arrived yesterday. Couldn't sit still for a minute and constantly asked when you would arrive", Andrea told her. Taylor sighed. She could only imagine how bad it must've been for him to watch what had been happening around her last few tour stops and not be able to do more than text and call her. "I'm happy you found someone who cares like that", Andrea continued. "Me too. Sometimes I still can't believe it. It's as if I didn't know someone could care the way he does", Taylor said taking a sip of her tee. "And I care too. It's not the same as the past few weeks but when I saw his last few games, I got pretty worried too every time he could've gotten hurt", she added. "Have you talked about that?", Andrea wanted to know. Taylor shook her head. "Not yet. I wanted to and then everything else happened", she answered. "Do that soon. He probably can't do much about it. It's his job but he should know", Andrea told her.

"I know. We still want to talk about the security things too. He's moved to his new house now and he asked if he could talk to my security about it", Taylor said. "Just the house?", her mom saw that it was more than that. As anticipated, Taylor shook her head again. "In general, I think. He... wants to know what he's gotten himself into I guess. And I feel bad that we didn't do it earlier", she said. "Do you think he's scared for his safety?", her mom asked. "I don't know", Taylor shrugged. "He always makes it sound like he's worried about my safety more but... I don't know. He doesn't know a lot about what could happen yet", she added. "You mean break-ins and similar things?", her mom questioned carefully avoiding the word stalkers. "Yeah. I mean... I think I once told him about the... bulletproof vest under my bed but I never explained why it's there", Taylor continued.

"I'm scared that he won't understand... or like... doesn't want to be in this kind of danger for the rest of his life", she admitted silently. Andrea took her hand that lay on the table. "He will understand. I think he really loves you", she said. "Maybe that's not enough", Taylor whispered close to crying. "But it's the most important thing of all, hm? He wouldn't even think about both of your safety, if he wouldn't love you", her mom tried to be positive for her. "I think I need a moment", Taylor just said before standing up and locking herself in by her piano. Besides Travis' arms, her music was probably what made her feel the safest now. So she played with some melodies coming up with a few words but crossing all of them the second they left her mouth.

Andrea cleaned up the kitchen. She knew it would be hard, but she wanted to make her daughter feel better over the next few days. It was obvious that Taylor would want to leave for Kansas soon but until then, Andrea would take care of her. She heard the piano and smiled to herself glad that Taylor had an outlet for everything in her music. When a sudden loud noise came from the music room, Andrea could imagine Taylor frustratedly slamming down a few keys. It wasn't like her to get angry and let it out on her instruments but it had happened before. Interrupting her wouldn't do anything though, so Andrea decided to just sit down in the living room waiting for her daughter.

Taylor felt bad as soon as the unpleasant sound of the piano she had just hit reached her ears. It wasn't okay to do that. She shouldn't get physical out of frustration even if it wasn't against people. So she forced herself to stand up and walk around her piano a few times breathing in and out concentrated. "It's okay. There's no reason to get angry. You'll find the right melody tomorrow", she told herself. "Just play something you know! Yeah, just sit down and sing some other song. Something that matches the mood to let it all out", she mumbled sitting down again. And for some reason "Castles Crumbling" was the song she chose. Lyrically, it didn't fit perfectly but the feeling of "crumbling down" was pretty much exactly what it was. "And you don't want to know me. I will just let you down" hurt more than she had expected it to. Today, she felt like the problem, like a failure, like she wasn't worth any of the love Travis gave her. And sitting here falling deeper into these thoughts didn't exactly help.

Taylor didn't leave her room until it was dark outside and she was sure that her mom would already be in bed. And Andrea was but she had left a good dinner on the table waiting for Taylor. She was incredibly thankful for her mom to be here even though they hadn't seen each other all day. When she went to bed, she also found a few messages from Travis on her phone: "Hey beautiful, I hope you could sleep some more after I left. Can I call you later?", "I'm back from practice. Call me anytime!", "Are you okay? I miss you", "I'm sorry, I didn't want to be annoying. Just text me when you want to talk.", "Seems like your mom had you occupied all day. I hope you're doing okay. Sleep well. I love you" The last text was only about an hour old. Taylor sighed feeling guilty for ignoring everyone since breakfast. She didn't want to ignore him. She didn't want to make him feel like he did something wrong. She didn't want any of that but she couldn't help it. There were no words she could force out of her brain even in text form, so she left him on read feeling even worse.

This chapter was published during the last minutes of the Red era🧣
Meaning I'm on time with my own schedule again😅