Undefined (Book #1 Joshler)

CHAPTER 15: Sleepover

It's been a week.
Day after day of therapy.
Day after day of headaches.
Day after day of blurry.
Day after day of not sleeping well.
Day after day in this new room.
So far the week is shit.
The only good thing about it is Josh. He's been coming to visit me everyday.
He always makes me feel better.

Sometimes they have to call Josh during the day to come calm me down after I freak out because I won't let anyone else near me.......
Now is one of those times.

It's about 2:30am and I just had a nightmare. The nurses came in to try and calm me down, it didn't work.
I ended up kicking a nurse in the face.

I kept crying for Josh until he walked through the door of my room. As soon as he did I jumped from the bed and clung to him as I cried.

"Shhh Ty, it's okay, I got you, I'm here." he whispered while picking me up and walking over to the bed.
I cried into his chest for a while as he whispered soothing things to me and rubbed my back.

"I hate this Josh." I said after a few minutes.
"You hate what?"
"Myself... The way I am. I hate the way my mind works. I hate everything about me."
"Shh don't say that."
"It's true though.. Why do I have to be like this? I hate it."
"I love the way you are.. It makes you, you. And I love you... Every tiny detail."
"Really? You don't think I'm weird or strange?"
"Of course not."
I smiled.

"....Josh?"
"Yes?"
"Can I um... Can we.. Um ..kiss?"
"If you want to." he chuckled.
"I want to."
I sat up and wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed my lips to his.
His hands trailed down my sides and rested at my hips
I started slightly pulling at the hairs on the nape of Josh's neck, he made a small noise at the action.
My mind was clouded and I didn't really know what I was doing, but I knew I wanted to hear that noise again so I continued pulling on the hair as he let more soft sounds flow from his mouth and into mine.
I shifted into a more comfortable position on his lap, he let out a throaty groan and immediately stopped.

"I-I t-think thats enough."he said swallowing thickly.
"...what? Why?"
"I... Um... Well..."
"Well what?"
"I-its complicated... Y-you don't understand what your doing Ty."
I shifted a bit trying to understand what he was talking about and he gripped my hips tightly holding back a moan.
"J-just s-stop moving okay?"
"...why?"
"I.. I don't know how to explain it really... I don't want to get in trouble either."
"Why would you get in trouble?"
He remained silent.
"Josh?"
"M-maybe I should go." He started to move me off him.
"No! Don't go please. I'm sorry.. I don't know what I did wrong but I'm sorry... I thought I was making you feel good." I whispered the last part.

Josh was now stood by the door. He sighed and walked back over to me.
"Well you were.. You were making me feel really good Ty but we could get in trouble if we take it any further."
"..oh... Because of the guards and stuff..."
"Yeah exactly. Trust me I would love to continue.. I just don't want to get in trouble."
I just nodded.
'HE'S LYING Y'KNOW.. HE JUST DOESN'T LIKE YOU'
'.... But-'
'HE WAS LYING THEN TOO.'
I sniffled and wiped my eyes as I felt tears coming.
"Ty?..... Ty whats wrong?"
'HE HATES YOU!'
"D-do you hate me?"
"What? No of course not Ty why would you think that?" he said pulling me into his chest.
"B-blurry said that your lying and you don't actually like me."
"The only one who's lying is blurry.... Because not only do I like you.. I love you Ty."
"I love you too.... Are you allowed to sleep here... I'm tired but I don't want you to leave."
"I'm not sure... I can go see... I'll be right back okay?"
"Okay."

Josh went out into the hall and closed the door behind him.

JOSH'S VIEW

I walked out of Tyler's room and found a guard.
"Hi.." I said
"Hello... Can I help you?"
"Oh um.. Tyler wants me to stay with him tonight while he sleeps... I didn't know if I was allowed so I came to ask if that's okay."
"I don't see the harm in it but we'll have to check with Dr. James first so follow me."
We walked down a few halls before stopping at Dr. James' office.
"Oh Joshua hello! What can I do for you?" he asked.
"Tyler wants to know if it would be okay for me to stay the night with him.."
".. I suppose it will be okay as long as he doesn't try that little stunt again."
"...what stunt?"
"You know what I'm talking about... Also I admire you for telling him to stop."
After a few seconds I realised what he was talking about.
"Ohhh.. Yeah no problem........wait... How did you know?"
"We have cameras in Tyler's room... Well not just in Tyler's in all the rooms just so we can keep an eye on them."
"Oh..."
"What?"
"I don't mean to sound rude or anything but doesn't that invade on their personal privacy?"
"I suppose it could but if we don't have them they could be using their bedsheets to hang themselves and we would never know so that's why their there."
"I see.... Well I should get back to Tyler."
"Okay see you later."

I made my way back to Tyler's room and went inside. He was sitting in a corner crying.

TYLER'S VIEW

"Oh god Tyler whats wrong?" Josh said while running over to me.
"Y-you were taking a long time.. I thought you left... Blurry kept telling me you left cause you hate me for what I did... I didn't mean to I'm sorry... I don't even understand what I did! Please don't hate me for it I'm sorry!"
"Hey no no no no.. I don't hate you Ty. I know you don't understand what you were doing and that's not your fault. The only reason I took so long is cause I had to go see Dr. James and ask him. I'm sorry I took so long."
He ran his hand through my hair a few times to get it out of my face.
"It's okay."
"Why don't we go to bed?"he said with a soft smile.
I nodded.
He picked me up and brought us over to the bed once again.
We both laid down and fell asleep in each others arms.