Undefined (Book #1 Joshler)

CHAPTER 28: Tyler.

JOSH'S VIEW ~

Something felt off when I woke up this morning.
I picked up my phone that started ringing while I was sleeping and woke me up.

"Hello?"
"..hi.."
"Dr. Varrence?"
"Yeah.. It's me."
"Is there something wrong? You sound upset."
"It's Tyler."
"...What about him?"
Mrs. Joseph came into the room, crying.
Dr. Varrence wasn't talking.
"What about him?!"
Still nothing.
I stood up.
"SOMEONE TELL ME WHATS GOING ON!"
"Josh... Tyler..."
Tears stung my eyes.
"NO!"
"No."
My lip quivered as I looked at Mrs. Joseph with tear filled eyes.
"No. Not that sweetheart. He's still here."
She hugged me.
"He almost wasn't though."
I struggled to get out of Mrs. Josephs grip but eventually she let go.
I dropped my phone and ran out of the house grabbing the car keys as I did.
I drove to the hospital and ran to Tyler's room.
It was closed off.
I went to open the door when someone grabbed me from behind holding my arms down.
"NO!! TYLER!!!"
"Josh calm down."
"TYYYLLLEEEERRRR!"
"Shhh I know, I know."
"Let go of me!"
"You can't go in there Josh."
"I need to go see Tyler! Tyler needs me! I NEED TYLER!"
I pried out of Dr. Varrences grip only for a guard to grab me when I tried running to Tyler's room again

Tears, flowed down my cheeks and fell to the floor.
Sobs, escaped my mouth.
"TYLER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Everyone was giving me sad looks.

I kicked the guard in the knee and he let go of me. I ran into Tyler's room. He was on the bed.
There was blood on the floor.
Nurses were wrapping his wrists.
He was asleep.
I slowly walked over to his bed.
The nurses seen me and moved away.
I laid down in the bed next to Tyler and hugged him.

"Can I be alone with him please."
The nurses nodded and left.
I placed a kiss to his temple.
"I thought I lost you. Tyler. I can't lose you. I love you so much. Please stay with me. I need you Tyler. You keep me grounded. If I didn't meet you God knows where I'd be. You mean so much to me Tyler. Don't leave me."

I seen his notebook next to him on the bed and grabbed it.
A page fell out.
I picked it up and read it.

Josh,

I'm sorry.
He was so loud.
He was so angry.
I couldn't take it.
I'm Sorry.
I wanted you but they wouldn't call you since you just left.
I should have told you he was back.
Maybe then they would have let you stay.
Maybe then you could have helped.
Maybe.
I'm sorry I couldn't stay alive for you.
But I'm still here.
If you need me. Ill be there.
You might not be able to see me.
But I'm there.
I'm here.
Stay alive for me.
I couldn't stay alive for you.
But you need to stay alive for me.
Please.
I love you Josh.
My happiness.
My love.
Take me far, far away.

Tyler.

I carefully slid the message back into the notebook.
I don't want Tyler knowing I read it when he wakes up cause it'll just make him feel worse.
I noticed a little pouch at the back of the notebook that I never noticed before.
I carefully opened it.
Inside there was a single blade covered in blood.
This is probably what he used.
Wait....is this why he wanted the notebook in the first place?
"Oh Ty." I placed another kiss to his head and hugged him tighter.

I fell asleep soon after.

°~°

"....Josh?"
"Hey."
"Are you mad?"
"No baby. I'm not mad."
"I'm sorry."
"Shh. Its okay. Your still here. I still got you."
"When you leave.."
He grabbed his notebook and took out the note he wrote me and ripped it up.
"Yeah?"
"Take the notebook with you. I don't want it anymore."
He handed it to me.
"Okay.."

Tyler moved so he was laying on my chest.
"Tyler?"
"Hmm?"
"Don't leave me. Please. I need you here."
"I know... I'm sorry."
"It's okay."
"... I can hear your heartbeat."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah.... You also smell nice."
"Do I?"
"Yes.. You always smell nice."
"Uh thanks."
"And your handsome."
"Mhm?"
"Yeah and your one of the nicest people I ever met."
"I am?"
"Yes."
"Why are you telling me all this?"
"Because I need to. I need to let you know how much I appreciate you."
"Oh.."
"I love you."
"I love you too."
"My arms hurt."
I carefully grabbed one of his arms and placed a gentle kiss over the bandages.
He smiled.

"Josh?"
"Yeah?"
"I think I found it."
"Found what?"
"My reason to stay alive..."
"Yeah? And what is it?"
"You."
"your mine as well."
"Really?"
"Mhm."
He smiled.

It was quiet for a while.
"Josh Do you think.."
"Do I think what?"
"Nothing it's stupid."
"No it's not. Tell me please."
"Do you think we'll still be together when I get out of here?"
"Yes I do. I'm taking you away when you do.. Remember?"
"Yeah. I remember... Just had to make sure."
"Okay."