Undefined (Book #1 Joshler)

CHAPTER 41: Leave Me Alone

"Josh no."
"Tyler we talked about this."
"No."
I tried to wiggle out of Josh's grip but was failing miserably.
"Tyler come on. Cooperate please."
"No I don't want to."
"Tyler."
"Joshua."
Josh raised his eyebrows at me.
"Don't call me that."
"Joshua Joshua Joshua!"
"Stopp."
"Joshua!!"
"Ugh."
"Let me go."
"No. Take your medication."
"No. Let me go."
"Not until you take it."
'GET MAD AT HIM.'
"I don't want to!"
"Tyler take it."
"No!"
"Tyler please. Everyday for the last week you've been fighting me on taking it just please take it."
I creased my eyebrows.
Then I got an idea.
"Fine."
"Thank you."
Josh let go of me to grab the cups.
I ran.
"Tyler!"
I ran around the room while Josh chased me.
He cornered me.
I swiftly bent down and escaped through the space between his legs.
I jumped up on the bed, Josh stood on the floor in front of the bed with his hands on his hips.
Both of us were panting from running around.
"Tyler."
"Josh."
"Get down off the bed and take your medication."
"No."
I ran to the edge of the bed and jumped off about the run to the other side of the room when Josh grabbed me by the waist.
I squeaked.
"No!"
I started giggling.
Josh threw me up over his shoulder.
"Josh no!" I laughed.
He was laughing too.
He walked over to the nightstand and set me down handing me the cups.
"Take it please... For me."
I nodded and took it.
"Open."
I opened my mouth and Josh inspected it to make sure I actually took it.
"Good job. Thank you."
"Since I took it you should give me a kiss."
"I should, should I?"
"Mhm."
He smiled and leaned down.

Dr. Varrence came into the room, making Josh pull away.
"Hello."
"Hi."
"Did you take your-"
"Yes."
"Okay good."
"You need to stop putting up a fight when you have to take it though."
I pouted at Josh.
"You don't like taking it?"
"No. Who would like taking a cupful of pills every morning that don't even do anything?"
"You don't think their helping?"
"No. Nothing ever helps."
Josh and Dr. Varrence shared a look.
"...what?"
"Are you sure their not helping?"
"...yes."
Josh sighed.
"Well you haven't been complaining about blurry lately so we thought it was helping."
"No blurrys still here."
'IT'S FUNNY HOW THEY THINK A FEW PILLS IS GOING TO GET RID OF ME.'
"Blurry thinks its funny."
"Thinks whats funny?"
"That you think the pills will help."
"Oh."
'WHY CAN'T THEY JUST ACCEPT THAT YOU CAN'T BE SAVED. YOUR A GONER TYLER!'
I looked down at the ground.
"Tyler?"
I walked over to Josh and leaned against his chest.
"Are you okay?"
Josh asked while hugging me.
I nodded.
"Don't lie to me Tyler."
I then broke down in Josh's arms.

"Hey shh your okay."
Josh rubbed circles into my back as I cried.
"No Josh. stop saying that. I'm not okay."
I got out between sobs and gasps.
He hugged me tighter and pressed his cheek to the top of my head.
"I'm going to leave you two alone and got talk to Dr. James. Okay?"
"Okay."

°~°

Josh had laid us down on the bed.
I was still crying.
Dr. James came in.
"Tyler? Dr. Varrence told me that you said the medication isn't helping.. Were going to try to up the dosage to see if that'll do anything okay?"
I turned my head the other way so I was facing the wall.
Dr. James sighed.
"Do you want anything before I leave? Water? Food?"
"I want to go home." I sobbed.
"I know you do but you can't."
"I don't see why not!"
I sat up and stared at Dr. James, startling Josh.
"Your unstable Tyler you know this. You know why you can't."
"Yeah so what I'm unstable who cares!? Whether I'm locked up in here or locked up in my house is no different! I don't see why people think its safer if I'm here! I'm still the messed up kid that hears voices in my head no matter where I'm at!"
No one said anything.
The only sounds were my sniffles.
Josh sat up and went to hug me.
"No."
I pushed his hands away.
He looked kind of hurt that I didn't want him to hug me.

I stood up off the bed and went over to the corner, sitting down.
'YOUR PATHETIC!'
I pulled my knees up and rested my chin on them.
'STUPID!'
'WORTHLESS!'
'WASTE OF SPACE'
'MEANINGLESS'
I just sat there letting blurry yell at me.
"Tyler?"
"Leave me alone."
"Tyler please."
"No! Just leave me alone!"
"Tyler I'm not leaving you alone."
Josh walked over to me.
'JOSH HATES YOU! YOU ONLY GET IN HIS WAY! HE CAN'T DO ANYTHING BECAUSE YOUR AROUND! YOUR SUCH A BOTHER!'
"Please! Just go! I'm sorry!"
"Why are you sorry?"
"For bothering you and getting in your way! I'm sorry just go and live your life without me! I'm sorry for wasting your time!"
"Tyler stop with that. You don't waste my time. Your not a bother and you don't get in the way now stop it."
"Tyler why do you think that?"
"Cause its true! Everything would be easier if I wasn't here! If I was gone no one would have to put up with me any more!"
"Tyler stop talking that way."
"Why? You don't want to admit it do you? You know its true!"
"Tyler stop it! If I didn't want to be here with you I wouldn't be here okay? I care about you so much! I love you so much Tyler! Your the best thing that's ever happened to me!"
I shrunk back and stared up at Josh.
"I don't see why you can't see that Tyler."
"I'm sorry." I whispered.
"Don't apologise."
I crawled forward and hugged Josh.

"Don't leave Josh. I'm sorry."
"I'm not leaving."
I sniffed and leaned into Josh more.
"M'tired."
"Want to take a nap?"
I nodded.
Dr. James said goodbye and left.
Josh took me to the bed and laid us down.
I fell asleep instantly.