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senior

This journal entry is a thank you to the world for having everything go so very right.
So i started my senior year of high school today. Its kinda absolutely crazy that i'm a senior, because i could never imagine myself as one but here i am, starting my very last year of high school. My very last year in my hometown. And of course ill come back and visit, I would never turn that down. But it will not be the same. When i graduate in june and move to either Boston or NYC, my whole family is uprooted. My mom is selling our house and moving, which of course means my dad and sister are moving too. although they don't know where yet.
The prospect of leaving my friends is scary and sad. I have been friends with these people for so many years, they have stood by my side, we have grown and changed together, and i love them so much. like it's absolutely crazy. They are my family, i could never ask for better friends, it almost scares me how much i love them. So i don't even want to think about leaving them. But of course college will be a wonderful opportunity to make new friends and start an independent life that i actually choose to live. and since 90% of my friends are going to school in new england, we will definitely get to see eachother. I would never want to stop being friends with them.
of course i am stressed about all the things for college that i need to take care of. finishing my application, essays, getting my letters of recommendation, on and on and on. but i know it will get done, and i know it will be worth it. so worth it. I cannot wait for college, because i feel like i've outgrown this town. I know it's cliche, but it feels like i am too big for it, too fast paced. Everything feels slow here: from transportation to the speed of maturity of the people around me. all i want is to be surrounded by new and interesting people and to have new experiences. I want to traval, i want to learn, i have a million opportunities and possibilities and i feel absolutely positively blessed. I never want to give the impression thag im not thankful, so here goes. I'm thankful for my family, even though they can be crazy and drive me nuts. I'm especially thankful for my mom, who stands by my side and supports me and loves me wildly and unconditionally (even though she just grounded the fuck out of me after she caught me and my friends smoking weed LMAO). i'm thankful for my incredible friends, despite all the drama that can occur between us, they make my heart full every day, make me feel validated, loved, and not ever alone. I'm thankful for my beautiful, sweet, loving girlfriend who never ceases to amaze me and who i miss every single day. Seriously, i love her. So much. I'm thankful for this year, and all the opportunities that are going to come with it. I'm thankful that in less than 4 months, i will have my ticket out of here in the form of a college acceptance letter (fingers crossed haha). I'm thankful for my life. I love where i am. Even with all the sadness of summer ending and the anxiety to get where i'm going to be going, I wouldn't want to change where i am right now. Time for senior year :)