Unexplainable [Original Version]

[chapter eighty-eight: "mr. and mrs."]

Chapter 88: "Mr. and Mrs."
Kevin Nash's POV

- - -

Holy fuck. This is actually happening. I'm going to be marrying Jolene today.

I'm standing here, looking at myself in the mirror, and it's just hard for me to wrap my mind around the fact that I'm about to be a married man. This is weird, and it feels like my heart is about to jump out of my damn chest.

"You okay in there, champ?" Dallas breaks me from my own thoughts. "Forget how to do your tie?"

"Fuck off." I let out a short laugh as I turn around in the bathroom, so that I can face the door. "I didn't forget how to do something that simple. I'm just, uh-"

"You're nervous, aren't you?" I can hear his amused cackle clearly. "That's natural, bro! You're getting hitched to the gal of your dreams. You're going to have some nerves."

"He's actually just terrified, because he knows he's going to be stuck with Jolene for the remainder of his life." Paul chimes in. "That'd be enough to make me to want to hide in the bathroom all day."

"I'm not hiding!" Am I?

"Then come on out." Thanks, Kid.

"If you don't get your ass out of there in thirty seconds, I'm coming in." Jesus, Dallas. "No one wants that."

"Why?" I ask as I open up the door. Dallas, Paul, and Kid are all standing in front of it. They're all wearing tuxedos like I am, and I have to say, these fuckers clean up nicely. "We've still got plenty of time, right?"

"We do, but there are a couple of people that really wants to talk to you before all this goes down." Dallas points behind him with his thumb, and as I follow the line he's pointing, I can't believe my eyes.

"Did any of you slip anything into my drink this morning?" I ask my friends. "Because this shit can't be happening."

There's no fucking way that Chuck and Mary Milford have shown up to their daughter's wedding.

"We're really here, Kevin." I've died, and Chuck is obviously some sort of hellish hallucination that is haunting me because I finger-fucked Joli during Christmas dinner.

"We thought we should talk to you before you..." Mary shudders. "Before you marry Jolene."

"Yeah, uh..." Kid mutters awkwardly. "We'll give you guys some space." He nods towards the door.

"Yep. Sounds good to me." Paul clears his throat before quickly scurrying out of the room. Kid follows closely behind him.

"Hey," Dallas places a hand on my shoulder and leans in close, so that he can whisper in my ear, "You need backup? Because I'll gladly kick their sorry asses out."

"No," I tell him as I shake my head, "I'll handle it." I pause. "Does Joli know they're here?"

"Nope. We're lucky Paula caught them when she did. Poor girl didn't have the heart to turn them away, so she sent them over here." Dallas pats my back. "I'll stay right outside the door. When you're done with them, I'll send them on their way."

"Noted." I tell Dally with a nod, signaling for him to go. As he passes by the parents, he and Chuck exchange glares. "So, what are the two of you doing here?" I ask as Dally closes the door behind him. "Come to fuck up one of the best days of your daughter's life?"

"We don't hate Jolene, Kevin." Mary scoffs.

"You had me fooled." I shrug. I really don't see why these pieces of shit are here. "Honestly, what brought you guys to Florida? We're not exactly close to Virginia."