Janet.
"Tip!"
"Tip!"
I was shaking him harshly to no avail. He was hungover and we had to go do sound check. "Johnathan Davis, wake the fuck up!"
He finally snapped up and looked at me. "Yo, chill out, ma. You tryna blow out my eardrum?" He said as he stretched out his body.
"Either I blow out your eardrums or I blow up your head? Which?"
He raised his hands in surrender before laying back down. "Ou, boy you gone make me fight you. Get your drunk ass up and get ready for sound check. Its half past two and I still have to rehearse with The Kids. So," I grabbed a pillow and hit him. "Get up."
I made my way off the bus and walked with Joey to the venue. Of course, Joey wouldn't be himself if he didn't pry into my personal life.
"So, you and Shawn worked out everything?" He asked as we made a turn as a corner.
"Yeah. We settled everything and just started with a flesh slate. I was getting tired of the rehashing."
"So you told her about the bab—"
"Joey Muldaloa!"
I stopped walking and just stared at him. I told him that in confidence, and he just brought it up. In the middle of the street like I'm not Janet Jackson. People could be eavesdropping.
"J, I'm sorry." He said quickly realizing I was offended.
I was stammered. I haven't thought about it in so long, it hit my like bricks when he brought it back up. I walked away from him, that was all I could think to do.
I heard him catch up with me. "J, I didn't mean to open an old wound. You said you two cleared everything, so I thought you meant that as well." He apologized. "I'm sorry."
By then, I'd made it to the venue. I turned to him and I could tell he felt bad. "Tell Tommy to get me and take me home tonight." I said.
"Janet, lo siento. Te quiero."
When he spoke Spanish to me, I knew he meant business. That's the language he uses when he yells at me for being careless, like when I walk through crowds with no security or drive without him and the team knowing where I'll go.
"Joey, I have to rehearse. I'll see you later."
I left him there on the street and went in to practice. I felt like all eyes were on me, but it was really just Gil. He always had a way of making me feel uncomfortable, like he knew all my business before I even got to tell him.
"J, we're gonna start in 10. Get stretched." Tina said to me. God I miss that woman.
Before I could go and talk to her, Gil pulled me. "Stretch and spill, honey." He said. "I could read your face from a mile away. What happened?"
We sat and started stretching. "Joey brought up..." I steered off seeing Shawn come around the corner. She smiled when we made eye contact and sent a wink my way. I grinned poorly and put my head down.
"He brought up what?" Gil asked.
"Shai."
Gil's mind was blank for moments before his eyes widened. "What?!" He loudly snapped.
I shushed him pulling him closer. "Shut up. God." I whisper-yelled.
"Sorry, boo. But why would he bring up Shai? That was like two years ago. We all agreed to forget about him unless it's an emergency, especially Joey. How did that even come about?"
"3 minutes guys." Tina announced.
I turned back to Gil. "I told him that Shawn and I cleared the slate and we were on good terms, and he assumed I told her about Shai." I sighed.
"Why would he even assume that? That was strictly between you, me, him, and the girls. Shawn doesn't have to know about S." He sternly said.
For Gil to want things hidden from Shawn, it's serious. Beyond serious. Shawn cannot know about Shai. Even as my girlfriend and the love of my life, there are some things even she can never find out.
"I don't know. But it put me in such a bad head space. I haven't thought about him in so long. By now, he probably hates me. I don't.." I felt tears coming.
Gil quickly fanned my face. "Not here, Queen. Not about him. If you want, we can go visit him soon, but you know you can't show emotions about him in public. After practice and the show, we can cry on the bus and stuff ourselves with ice cream. But, not now." He said as he fanned.
"I know, I know." I said fanning my eyes as well.
"Alright, let's start." Tina called.
Gil hugged me, "It's okay, Queen. Shai is happy and in a good place. I promise." He said in my ear.
"I hope so."
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
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