Believing In You (Blue Bloods Fanfiction)

↞ Chapter Twenty-One ↠

Episode Eight and Eleven

"Doorbell!" The screech of my landlady came from downstairs, nearly making my drop my mug. I yelled back a thank you, and pressed the button to speak whoever it is in.

"Straight up the stairs." I spoke through the intercom system first, before pressing the button to let whoever it was in. I could hear whoever it is come thunking up the stairs, I stood up, walking to put the kettle back on.

"Hello?" I smiled, recognizing the voice as Jameson's.

"I'm in the kitchen." I grabbed another mug down, and as he came around the corner I glanced up with a smile. "Cocoa?"

I could hear the smile in his voice as he responded, "Please."

I nod, scooping the power from my tin into the mug. Just as the kettle began to whistle I pulled it off, pouring it over the powder and adding a splash of milk. I smiled to him as I passed it over, grabbing my own from the counter top, it was quiet between the two of us for a minute, and in the silence I got to get a good look at him.

He wasn't look at me, instead his eyes were closed and he held his mug close to his face. Jameson's face was taunt, like there was something he was thinking about, and when I focused a bit more, my coat was across his shoulders. The fabric seemed to swallow him, and guarantee if I could see the bottom of the coat it would be scraping his ankles. It was a sight, seeing this man in a coat of mine, in something that seemed to make him so small.

"My TO and I, we found the body of a jumper." His voice was sad, but that wasn't what was bothering him. "When homicide showed up it was a detective from the 12th, a guy called Sonny Malevsky."

The name rang a bell, but I wasn't exactly sure why. Jameson sighed before continuing.

"He ruled it a suicide, and as he left he called me over to him." I leaned forward, a bit more interested. "Malevsky told me that I should watch myself around you, because you can't be trusted."

I tensed, and it went quiet again. This man, he obviously knew who I was, but the name didn't even bring a face to mind when he was mentioned. Jameson looked at me like he was expecting something. I set my mug down on the counter top.

"I don't know that detective." It was the truth.

"Then why would he say you can't be trusted." Jameson wasn't angry, he sounded as though he just wanted an answer. I stood straight, walking around the island that was between us and resting my hip against the counter top next to him. He faced me, head tilted back to look me in the eyes.

"I don't know." It was the truth.

"Can I trust you?"

Trust is the most important thing for officers. If you can't trust your partner then you're walking the streets alone.

"Toujours." He looked at me slightly confused, "It means always."

"Toujours." Jameson muttered it back, and I smiled at his pronunciation. It was perfect, like him.

He took a step closer, shortening the already small gap between the two of us. I didn't move. Jameson said it again, perfect again.

"Toujours." Jameson stood on his toes, his hand found its way to the side of my neck. "Toujours." He lips were inches from mine, and I wasn't sure what to do. Sure, we flirt, but I wasn't expecting anything from it, no matter how much I wanted.

He closes the gap.

I fumble slightly, before wrapping my arms around his waist, pulling his hips towards me, he stumbled. Jameson falls into me, but the kiss doesn't break. I turn so my back is resting on the edge of the counter, trying to pull him closer to me.

Jameson pulls back, his cheeks flushed and his mouth parted slightly. My hands loosened a bit on my grip of his waist, but I didn't let go.

"Wow." He spoke softly, his head falls onto my chest and I can feel his hot breath through my shirt.

I set my cheek on the top of his head, wrapping my arms around his shoulder in a sort of hug. We stood like that for what felt like a long time, before he finally pulled back just a bit. Jameson had an amused smile on his face.

"What is it?" I asked, watching as he shook his head a bit.

"I haven't kissed someone like you in a long time." I smiled at his answer.

"Ah," I nodded, "A Londoner." He laughed, a full chested laugh. One that echoed through him into me, I smiled brighter, if that was even possible. I knew what he really meant, but I wanted to hear that laugh. A laugh that felt like it was just for me.

Jameson leaned forward, to kiss me again, but I could only assume. He lost his balance, and my arms tightened around his waist, making sure he wouldn't fall. His fingers splayed across my abdomen, icy cold. He smiled, a ripple of laughter passed through him again, light and soft, he tried to kiss me again but I stopped him.

"Was that your first kiss with a guy?" I muttered my question while looking down with him, and he nodded slowly. "Bullocks." I muttered it again, slowly standing up straighter. "Jameson, I can't do all of that again."

He looked confused, lowering his hands, but not taking them off of my chest.

"Jameson, I've done the coming out thing." It took him a second, but he suddenly understood. He didn't pull away. We stood together, my arms wrapped around his waist, his hands on my chest. His forehead pressed against my collar bone, my chin on his head. We just stood there, breathing in sync.

"Toujours." He muttered the word against my shirt, and I smiled. Whatever was between us, would continue existing, and he would come out, in his own time. Everything would happen step by step.

He left my flat, leaving me breathless, and with my coat.