The force in redemption | Kylo Ren x reader | ✔

Chapter 86, Join me

/ First Person Protagonist POV / 

I looked at Kylo with my eyes widened to a point I didn't even know was humanly possible and my mouth slightly parted opened as I stopped breathing for a couple seconds, my brain appearing to still be processing what Kylo had told me moments earlier. Kylo took off his mask and let it rest on the interrogation table, sighting.  Did I hear right? Or is my mind playing tricks on me? My conscience maybe?! I asked myself startled and a little bit worried. Kylo wants me to join... the Knights of Ren?!

I didn't say anything for a little bit of time, and I could see in Kylo's eyes the silence was making him a little bit uncomfortable. I shook my head in order to bring back my thoughts into the reality of the situation, but my face expression remained the same: astonished. 

" Pardon?" Was the only thing that I was able to babble out, even if I had heard what Kylo had offered perfectly fine, I had to hear him say it again, to confirm I wasn't going mad. 

Kylo shifted his weight to his other leg and even if I knew it would be almost impossible to witness, he looked nervous and unsure. " The Knights of Ren, y/n. I'd like you to join them." He repeated so casually yet with a little bit of difficulty and stutter in his words.

I didn't reply. It felt as if yet again I was processing what Kylo had told me, but the truth was: I had no idea what to answer him. I didn't really want to say yes, because the idea of joining a type of dangerous and slaughter related cult, at least that was what I'd heard people whisper about here and there in my time as the Crimson Hunter. At the same time, I didn't want to decline Kylo's idea. I wanted to stay with him, but I hadn't thought of any way we could without keeping it secret and unsuspicious. On the other hand, he had thought about this, at least I hope he did, I told myself as I breathed deeply and calmed my mind from rushing in all different directions of overthinking. 

" The Knights of Ren?" I questioned, even if I had a vague idea of who they were. 

Kylo nodded his head slowly and took a seat on the opposite side of the table, as if this was a real interrogation. " Yes. You see, y/n, I've thought about it, and I've reached the conclusion and acceptance that you do not want to be a part of the Final Order." He said, which startled me. " W- what?!" I muttered, even if yet again, I had heard perfectly what he had said. 

" I know you don't want to be a member of the Final Order, and maybe forcing you into becoming my apprentice was wrong, but Snoke had ordered it." Kylo added, speaking surprisingly calm. " But he's dead now, and I make the decisions here." As if I didn't already know that, I told myself a little bit annoyed, not knowing why.

" You're right." I said bravely. " I realized you can tell based on my fondness on some of your... enemies..." I muttered, saying the last bit a little illegibly and almost like a whisper. Kylo nodded calmly in approval, and I wasn't sure as if to feel a little bit worried that I was confessing I cared about people considered as traitors and rebels at the eye of the galactic military coup.

" I figured." Kylo whispered to himself, but I was able to hear him slightly. 

The Knights of Ren... I thought to myself, trying to remember if I had read anything about them, but there were barely books I had gotten the time to read, plus, there wasn't much on Sith culture, or rather cults. " How is this a solution to my... difficult reintegration?" I asked, intending to change the awkward subject of my 'unloyalty' to the Final Order,  not really sure if it was the correct usage of words.

" The Knights of Ren aren't directly filtrated with the Final Order, you know that, right?" Kylo asked, assuming I knew. It felt a little bit embarrassing to shake my head and remain silent, I didn't want him to think I was dumb for not knowing something he had made it seemed to be obvious. " No, I'm afraid I haven't heard much about these mysterious Sith dedicated cult warriors." I replied with the little confidence I had left. 

Kylo seemed to have chuckled at my observation, but it appeared he had only shaken his head slightly to the side, as if to prevent a smile from appearing across his beautifully carved face. Dammit, I thought to myself. I really yearned for his smile. " Cult?" He repeated, a little bit surprised. I nodded slightly. " I mean, I guess?" I muttered. 

Kylo shook his head and looked at the dimly lit roof, in disbelief. " Do you really think so low of me, y/n?" He said, " The Knights of Ren are not a cult. And I am definitely no sect leader." He added. I looked at my shoes, a little embarrassed. " Sorry." I whispered a little loudly. 

" The Knights of Ren are... dark side warriors, but aren't affiliated with the Final Order directly, y/n. The only connection that they have with the Order is that I'm their master." Kylo explained. " They are also Force sensitives, which wouldn't be a problem for you. Except you are force trained unlike them..." Kylo kept talking, as if he was revising his plan to himself. 

My brain took yet again much time to process what he was saying, soaking in every bit of information with great attention. " Their master." I muttered to myself, even if I thought Kylo had heard me, he didn't comment on my observation. " They aren't Jedi, nor are they Sith, a little bit like you." Kylo added. " You could guide them at my side, you know?" He muttered, as if he was trying to desperately convince me while his hand reached for mine.

" Kylo... the infiltrator could be watching." I warned him as shivers ran through my body at the feeling of his touch. "  I don't care. It's my ship." He said in a dominant and low voice. We remained silent for a couple minutes before he stood up and dusted off his robes, clearing his throat. 

His tall figure towered over me more than usual as I was seated. " Join me." Kylo stated in a low voice, his hand extended to me 

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GURL TAKE DAT HAND LIKE IT'S THE LAST COOKIE IN DA BATCH.

I wanted to describe a little bit who the Knights of Ren are, and I will continue to explain it later on as we proceed with the chapters. YES, I DO RESEARCH ABOUT STUFF LIFE THIS FOR THE BOOK, CAUSE I HONESTLY WASN'T TOO SURE ABOUT A LOT OF BASIC INFO ABOUT THE KNIGHTS.

ANYWAS.....

I really liked this chapter, and I hope you did too!!!!!! It feels so amazing to slowly be passing the writer block and procrastination phase I seemed to be stuck in for all of last and this week! Can't wait to get back on track with good writing and to share more chapters!

Have a wonderful day and night, and happy lovers month to all of you lovebirds.

MEANWHILE ME: IMMA WATCH STAR WARS AND HARRY POTTER AND EAT CHOCOLATE.

- Camille