New Moon (My Little Pony)

28 The Bloom of Lazuli (3/7)

I took my chance the very next day before Bud entered her greenhouse. I watched her from the clouds as she let out her horror of the field she worked so hard to grow. All of her flowers and vegetables were dragged out from the dirt and squashed on the stone tiles.

She mourned them as if they were real creatures, collecting their seeds and dropping them in a wagon. She grabbed a match from a shed in the greenhouse and lit them on fire. She just idly sat there with her plush foal, watching the fire turn her children to ash.

This wasn't what I was going for. I wanted her to feel the same pain as I did. I was so sure that those plants meant a lot to her since they came from her seniors that were apparently her only friends in this city.

I got irritated at how easy she took the loss. And you know, when I get mad, I get really confrontational.

I burst into the greenhouse and dashed before her to leer at her surprised face. "The heck was that!?"

"Oh, hi Lazuli. Are you feeling better—"

"Ugh, you're so annoying! How can you take this so easily? Did those plants mean nothing to you?"

"Huh...Lazuli, you didn't..."

"You bet I did," I admitted. "I told you that I would get even with you. I'm going to make you feel the same pain as I did."

"...I'm sorry."

"Huh?"

"You looked like you were in a lot of pain," Bud started rubbing the foal in her hoof. "I wondered if I should have followed after you, but since you're fast, I thought it'd be best I talk to you the next day."

"—"

"I am upset that you took your anger on my plants. But, if they helped ease your pain in any way, then I can at least take solace in that."

Could you believe it? I snuck into her garden and destroyed everything she worked for months to grow. She should've hated me, but instead, she apologized to me and still held that same care for me. Either she was the kindest mare in all of Equestria or she was just so naive and stupid.

Either way, it made me feel small. Like I was now not only a failure but now a brat that was being consoled by an adult. My pride couldn't take it.

"Shut up," I leered at her. "What do you even know about me? You're just some weirdo without any friends. All you have is that stupid toy you carry around you..."

A thought came to mind at that moment and my body proceeded to go through with it before I could think it through. I pushed Bud to the ground, snatching the plush toy from her as she gazed at me in appall.

"Wait," Bud hurriedly raised back to her hoof to reach for the plush, but I used my wings to ascend beyond her reach. "Please, don't hurt him."

"So this is what you really care about," I dawned upon the plush toy. It was so strange to me how something so meaningless as a toy could mean so much to a pony. But if destroying could make her feel the same pain that I believed she brought to me, I thought I could find some sort of peace in it.

To be honest, I was just looking for anything to swing my anger at just as Bud said. Ever since my dad put me in this path to become a wonderbolt, I never failed a competition before. I trained so hard for each one under his guidance and even going beyond to find ways to improve myself on my own. I achieved a perfect streak of victories through my school years up to that point because of that drive.

With my perfect streak, becoming a wonderbolt would've become a breeze. But then that one loss changed everything for me. The perfection I created for my dad was stolen, crumbled, gone. I truly believed that I was ruined and felt the need for Loving Bud in some way to feel that same pain.

My hoof wrung on the neck of the plush toy. In just a span of a second, I would unleash my wrath on the feeble mare I blamed for causing me a great shame. It would be justice, I believed. I was in the right to do this, I believed. She brought this on herself, I believed.

Loving Bud cried and begged for me to stop. The raw pain on her face should have been delectable, but it only made me sick. Something about it felt so wrong like it shouldn't belong there. I hated it. And I hated that it was me that was causing it.

...I couldn't do it. I was about to get exactly what I wanted and I couldn't go through with it. I smacked my lips as I dropped the plush toy.

Bud caressed that toy so strongly as if it had nearly died. I didn't want to be around it. I didn't want to be around her. So I did the one thing I was apparently really good at, running away.