Nothing like some lovely lapidot

A Four Year Old

Peridot POV
Having to carry lapis to the car and then to the dorm room gave me the sudden realization that I need to work out. She's definitely out of it but I can't tell what happened to her. I know that I was fine and that out drinks were different but hers tasted only the slightest bit off. I can't tell if she's been drugged or if someone put alcohol in her drink but there was some sort of foul play. The fact that someone else handled our drinks was suspicious enough but I was too distracted to think much of it.
"Hey come here I have a secret"
"Just say it lapis no one else is here"
"NooOooOooOoOoOo"
"Fine"
I get closer and she moves towards my ear.
"I have a girlfriend"
"Yes lapis I know"
She jumped up in some sort of surprise, it kinda startled me.
"Who told you? Was it aqua?"
This idiot is gonna drive me insane
"No lapis I've met her"
"Oh okay"
How fun, my girlfriend now has the mental capabilities of the average 4 year old. It's probably best if I try to get her to sleep as soon as possible. Having to convince her to not jump off the top bunk is giving me a headache.
"Lapis it's time for bed now"
"No"
Well I tried
"You have to sleep"
"I wanna shower"
I'm not sure she can handle showering without falling over and busting her head open but I doubt she'd sleep without a shower. Besides maybe a cold shower is enough to sober her up a little.
"Okay but if you need me just call out, okay?
"Yes sir"
     The entire time she showered I sat patiently on the bed listening to the water. I didn't wanna go anything else in case I heard a shampoo bottle fall or something. She's a walking disaster right now so I can never be too safe with her. Eventually I heard the water die down and the shower curtain get pulled aside. The remainder of the time was fairly silent beside the occasion fumbling of a towel and such. After what seemed like forever I heard the door knob turn.
"Took you long enough I was starting to wonder if you got stuck or somethi- aaaannnnnndddddd you're naked"
     When lapis walked out she had her towel at her shoulders drying her hair and the rest of her body completely uncovered. Although I'd seen her like this before it's usually like dark or something and I don't see all of her this much or like when we kiss I close my eyes and stuff. Long story short I turned my head away as fast as I could and slowly morphed into a tomato.
"Why are you red?"
I don't know maybe cause you're flipping naked
"No reason"
"WAIT are you sick?"
"No lapis I am not sick now please put on some clothes"
     She completely ignored me and started to walk closer. She turned my face towards hers and put a hand to my forehead.
"But you're warm"
"Cause it's hot"
"No it's not it's cold"
"That's cause you're not wearing anything"
"I'll make some tea"
I swear if this woman doesn't cover up I'll blow a fuse.
    Well if she's gonna act like a kid I have just the trick to make her put something on. Something she's always asking me for and doing regardless of anything I say.
"Hey lapis do you wanna wear one of my hoodies?"
The second her face lit up I knew she'd fallen into my trap.
"Can I wear the black one?"
"You can pick which ever one you want"
    She happily walked over to my clothes and shuffled though some hoodies. Eventually she pulls out her favorite a plain black hoodie with a bright green alien head. Once she put it in I could finally think a little and cool down.
     She's still a big softie even if her brain is mush so I'll just use that to my advantage. I grab my sleeping clothes and head to the bathroom to change.
"Hey where are you going?"
"The bathroom"
"Why?"
"To change and get ready for bed"
"Why don't you change here"
"Cause...well you see, yeah I don't know"
"Do you not like me looking at you?"
She looked like she was about to cry.
"Hey no no that's not it, I'm just uhh shy?"
"Awwwwww it's okay you're cool and stuff so I like you"
I end up changing in front of lapis as I try to avoid her stupid smile and sharp gaze.
     Trying to get her to bed is going to be difficult considering she doesn't want to right now and is full of way too much energy. I have to convince her to get into the bed first then she'll probably just kinda pass out.
"Hey lapis come here for a sec"
"Why?"
"I want to uhhhhhhhhh, cuddle"
"I have a girlfriend"
Okay well I'm not sure if I should be offended or not but she also just walked around naked and watched me change. Someone she doesn't think is her girlfriend so that's a talk for when she's sober
"I am you're girlfriend lapis"
"No you're not my girlfriend isn't blurry"
Oh for fucks sake
"Well can't we cuddle as friends?"
"Yeah okay I guess that's fine"
    She finally gets into the bed leaving me very conflicted on how easily she got into bed half naked with her "friend". Regardless everything went as planned and she's now dead asleep so I guess I'll just have to discuss that in the morning.