☸42: Regrets☸

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Warning: Violence

Warning: Violence

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(Y/n)'s P.O.V.

*One day later*

"It felt empty in the headquarters without you." Her voice was all too familiar, but I'll never get used to hearing her talk sadly. I kept my gaze on the ground, not even bothering to look at her in the eyes.

*Thud*

I glanced at what happened and saw Hange's back facing me as she leans on the metal bars of my cell.

"Do you remember the first week after Erwin found you? It was one of those golden moments when he finally has the permission to take custody of you. He showed you off to Commandant Shadis, to Nile, Pixis, and every other high-ranking officer. We even threw a celebration for you."

"Commander Pixis! Have you seen my daughter? She'll blow us all away when she grows up!" Erwin was carrying me on his shoulders, and I just beamed the cutest smiles to every officer Erwin meets.

"More like you've blasting a canon with your rowdy voices." I bluntly said and heard a light chuckle from her.

"You'd always cling to me when Erwin's not around. Always hanging on my leg and keeping me company whenever I read at the library. You even made the cutest poem, out of boredom" A small smile managed to escape my lips, but I instantly shrugged it off, knowing that she'll catch me off guard. She then started reciting the poem I wrote.

"Step into a new day. We can rise up from the dust and walk away. We can dance upon the heartache. So, light a match, leave the past, burn the ships..."

"And don't you look back." We both recited the last line.

(A/N: Burn the Ships – For King and Country)

"I still don't know what a ship is, but I always thought you misspelled it for sheep. I wish we could just turn back the time, you know? Back when we were always losing against Titans. We were always happy with you, Erwin, Levi, Miche, and Moblit." I wish for the same thing, Hange.

"I've never seen Levi get colder before. Yesterday, I heard glass shattering in his quarters, but I couldn't get to him because he was shutting everyone out." It's for the best. Blankly staring at the emptiness of the ceiling, my right hand gripped the baseball.

"Do you know what Erwin said to Levi on his dying breathe?" She paused for how many seconds and heaved a sad sigh. "(Y/n), don't grow up to fast."

I lightly gasped at what she said and abruptly covered my mouth with my left hand. Hange always knows what catches me off guard. She then turned around to face me as I avoided any eye contact with her.

"Doesn't all those fond memories and experiences mean nothing to you?" They meant a lot, a little too much. I am who I am because of you.

"No, you may not understand why I committed mass murder all my life, but soon enough, you'll know..." I stammered as tears started blurring my vision and my voice quivering. "that I'm doing this for Eldia and Ymir!"

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