Nothing feels better then this
Nothing feels better then this
This is where your loves got me
Nothing feels better
"Are you hungry?" Natalie asks. It has been a month after that mini incident and everyone around me has been treating me like an egg. Natalie is so worse that she offers to even bath me. I hate how it is honestly.
"I'm fine" I reply still watching my favourite series. It's what I have been doing lately. I have been going to work and when I come back I slouch on the couch or on my bed watching movies.
"Brittney I know about your crush" Natalie blurt pressing the wrong button. "You what?" I turn to look at her with so much anger. Could this be the reason why she's treating me like a teenager. I don't know what is it that she wants from me. Why can't she just kick me out of her apartment. "Yes I do and it's a disgrace" she says with so much confidence.
"You the one.. what happened to privacy?" I ask her while standing up to face her. Well since I started spending time with Vally I would write down everything in my journal. It sounds funny for a 21 year old to have a journal but it's my escape route. Speaking of Vally we haven't been bothering each other.
We both have been staying away from each other's ways. It has given me time to process everything that is going on. I don't need another pile of problems when I have another lot. She knows how much I hate it when people snoop around with my things especially things like these. I feel like bashing her head against the wall.
"Doctor Jasper knew something else was up with you. It wasn't just all about dad's loss but also your feelings. Now whose he?" She gives me a serious look and crosses her arms.
My anger calms down just a little as she doesn't know him. But I'm still mad at her for breaking our girls code.
"I don't have time for this" I say and walk past her.
"Listen here miss" she grabs my arm so I can meet her angry face. I have seen her upset but today is the first time I am seeing her so furious. We did have our days when we were not in good terms but I've never met this side of her.
"I'm trying to help you and your stuck up depression. But you selfish and only think about yourself.. You always hurt those who love you that's why.." She pauses and closes her eyes. She is taking us back to the past. I really can't believe her.
Those words being said by her hurt ten times more then being stabbed. I thought we were over that bridge but it seems like we haven't crossed it. I can feel the tears and I'm on the verge of another breakdown. "Why mom always put you before me right?" A tear rolls down my cheek as I remember.
"Thats why step dad always found ways to shout at me?". As if realising what she said was wrong she's also in tears.
"Thats why you always bullied me and got away with it" I finish off her sentence for her.
"Brittney you never understand" she speaks between sobs.
"Understand what Natalie.. I used to think I'm adopted. I used to doubt myself. I used to hate myself because of you, mom and step dad. What's there that I don't understand. Huh?" I shout in her face.
"You can't blame your depression on us. We want to help but you, you selfish" she let's go of my arm.
"Selfish huh.. You got everything in a gold platter while I had your leftovers. Natalie have you ever asked yourself why my stuck up depression started after dad's loss?" I ask her. She just looks at me with teary eyes. I am going to let it all out today. "Exactly you the cause of it" .
"And I see you put a name to it. Depression it is" I give a fake laugh and clap my hands. I thought I had her by my side but it seems like the Natalie will always be Natalie. She will always be the bully that always got everything on a golden platter.
Just when I thought she changed. She has changed to the worst. "It is depression... Brittney I tried my best all I ever did was love you" she sighs and wipes her eyes.
Her eyes that are ocean blue just like Dads are now bloodshot red because of her crying. "You know nothing about love.. hurting me. You call that love?" I ask her and walk away from her with my hands in my hair and my eyes closed.
"I tried my best.. I was also hurting after father's loss not just you okay" she shouts back at me. We were all hurting but not like me. None felt the pain I did. Nobody. Mother moved on after a few months, Natalie had a new father figure while I.. I was left all by my self.
"Of course Natalie. You were all sad, hurt, depressed, upset, you were crazy.." I laugh at myself remembering the day they all called me crazy for talking to my father's picture.
"You were heartbroken while I was all jolly with mom. I went on trips and vacations and had smoothies on a island full of handsome, well sculptured guys in they boxes feeding me coconuts and pineapples...." I look at her and she's getting all furious now. I can tell by the way her colour eyes change.
Dad's colour eyes always changed when he was upset and I was the only one that could calm him. It feels as if he is looking right back at me. "Fuck you Brittney. Just leave my house and get lost and I hope wherever you go the trains gets off the railway and bumps your stinky, stuck up...." She pauses and takes the pillow.
"Yes hear me correctly.. your stuck up depression.." She screams at me while throwing the pillows on the floor.
"Ladies what's going on" Alex comes running from his office. He must have heard us shouting and swearing at each other. I just heard what she has been wanting to tell me. That's what she has always wanted to tell me.
"Sure. I hope you burn in this house, tsk" I click my tongue and walk out of the house.
I stop a taxi coming pass. During the highway drive tears fall down my cheeks like a storm.
H/ N: sister war 😭
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Song: better
Artist: Khalid
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Romance»»»» A young girl who has been through a lot in the past moves with her sister to another place. Every thing works out well for her until her water pipe breaks. Secrets are revealed , relationships are broken, friendships are betrayed and that's...
