Tears of our Ruins

Our Ruins

ELLIOT

Cora looks nervous as she climbs into the front seat of my car. She gives me a small smile and then stares out the window. Her body is pushed so closely against the door like she needs to be far away from me. Fuck. This isn't looking good for me. The tension in the car is thick and I'm drowning in it. Neither of us talk as I drive the short distance to our ruins. I get that a lot has happened. I get that we broke up. I get that we both hurt each other but why is she acting like this? I feel like I'm missing something.

I park and my heart skips a beat as I see a twinkle in her eyes as she looks at me. Coming here was definitely the right choice. We get out and walk in silence. She keeps putting distance between us but I keep closing that distance. I need to be close to her.

"Race ya to the top?" I gently elbow her and wink. My heart sores as I'm rewarded with her beautiful laugh but it's soon silenced as heaviness falls between us again. Fuck. We walk a few more steps before she begins sprinting. Now I'm laughing as I chase after her. Her laugh once again rings out into the silence surrounding us. My instinct is to tackle her to the ground and kiss her hard. I desperately want to, but I won't.

We're both panting and breathless as we successfully run up the entire hill. We fall on the ground and Cora giggles again. "That's a first."

"I knew we could do it someday," I chuckle.

I reach for her hand and she allows me to take it, but I feel her flinch. "Elliot," she whispers.

"Cora." I roll onto my side and look down at her. She looks like a gorgeous angel. I won't be ok without her. "What are you thinking?" I study her face. Her brain is running everywhere. I see it in her eyes.

"That things are so complicated now. I wish we were young again."

"They don't have to be complicated," I say softy, my voice filled with desperation. She needs to give me another chance. I can't screw this up right now.

"It always will be. So much has happened."

"What? What happened exactly? We fought? We broke up? You left? None of that has to be complicated, Cora. Look, I fucked up. When you came to see me, I should have pulled you into my arms and told you how I really felt. I was scared though. I was scared of pushing you into hurting yourself, which I now know how stupid that was. I needed you to be ok. I knew I couldn't let anything happen to you, and I freaked out. I was going to fix it the next day. I was going to tell you how I really felt and beg you back. You were gone though. You disappeared and I didn't get the chance. I want you, Cora. I did then and I still do now. I've always wanted you."

Tears are glistening in her eyes and she sighs. "You just don't understand. It's more than that."

"Look, I'm sorry I said hurtful things that made you break up with me. I'm so sorry. I was out of line. I was scared though, Cora. I couldn't stand that you were putting yourself in danger by meeting with Lindsey and you weren't listening to me. She did terrible things to your mom and I was worried she'd hurt you too."

"I get that, Elliot. I do. I see that now. I know that you were upset because you were scared."

"Ok. So why are you making it complicated then?"

"I can't explain it. It just is."

Frustrated, I sit up and rub my face. "Is it that guy? I heard you had a boyfriend."

"Bradley?" Jealousy runs like fire through my body as I hear her say a name. "Bradley's not my boyfriend. We went on a few dates. That's all." Did he kiss you? Did he touch you? I was suppose to get to show you everything. Did he take that from me? Shit. I need to get this jealously under control.