Even If No One Wants You, I Do

Chapter 68 - Even if no one wants you, I do.

Normal text
Thinking
Onomatopoeia

Keira's POV
I stumbled my way into a dilapidated temple, coughing up blood while wheezing away. My heart was in so much pain. It's as if a lunatic was stabbing me repeatedly in the chest. At this point, my brain was so confused by the lack of oxygen that I'm not even sure if the agony was from the pain of God's restriction or just sadness from the awful farewell. All I knew was that it hurt so much. The loneliness. The abandonment. Everything. I want everything to end already. Why must my ending always be so sad...

I collapsed on a worn-out wooden chair and focused on breathing. And pushing those painful memories to the back of my mind.

What the fuck, Keira?! You already succeeded! You're gonna be rich! So why are you trying to make yourself depressed for no reason! Once you're rich, friends will come to you! No need to cry over something like this!

I took multiple deep breaths. My erratic heartbeat finally slowed down to a rhythmic thumping. The stabbing pain subsided, leaving behind soreness in its wake. I could finally release my clenched fists. I looked down at my sweaty hands. Four tiny little notches were engraved deep into each of my palms from how hard my fingers dug into them. Adding to the old scars I always had at the edge of my palm. I absent-mindedly stroke on them. The persistent marks that wouldn't leave no matter how hard I scrub. It would never heal. While staring at them, the blue glitter on my finger caught my eye. The ring Senior Ahri gave me. My fingers grazed its cold metallic surface, the same coldness I felt when she looked at me just now.

Why am I even wearing this...

I started pulling it out.

"Don't casually take it out."

The memory of Senior's warm voice made me pause. I suddenly couldn't bear to remove it.

If I did it, wouldn't she feel sad?

That bizarre and hilarious thought made me want to laugh at myself. What a joke. I've always known something like this was gonna happen. I mean, I don't even belong here. I'm just an outsider destined to leave sooner or later. It was only a matter of time. That's why I had repeatedly told myself not to get attached to anyone here. Because there's no point creating a bond just for it to be broken in the end. But I still went on to stupidly make friends. Even falling in love here! What a colossal joke of the year.

I shook my head to clear out those depressing thoughts. Now that I stopped wheezing like an old hag, I stood up and walked towards the standing statue of God. To be honest, it looked nothing like that bastard. And now that I think about it, what's there to worship about a deranged psycho that moved people along like puppets??? He's not God! He's just a typical selfish ass that looks at others' sufferings in glee. He was as ugly as his fucking black heart. And now, I have to pray to this fucktard for me to leave this damn place. I still had to rely on him to get rich. So guess what? I'm just as hypocritical as that supposed 'God'. I'm in no position to stand on a moral high ground.

I stopped in front of the bloody statue and knelt down, putting my hands together and praying like a deluded bitch. I was waiting for the familiar portal to appear and take me out of this place. But a few minutes passed and nothing happened. I was still in this godforsaken temple.

Panic washed over my heart as I shouted, "Bastard! Why aren't you taking me away?! It's our agreement! You promised me! You promised to give me riches and power!"

But the damn statue remained still as ever, its marbled eyes staring at my plight emotionlessly. As if mocking me for even believing in this damn fairy-tale dream.

"No... No... This isn't part of our deal! You can't go back on your words!"

Not after I've sacrificed so much!