INSIDE THEIR MINDS

We Are Fine

PHIL
"KATE, KATE WHAT'S HAPPENING!?" I asked even though I already knew what was happening. Panic. I felt panicked.

"What do you think?"she asked me sarcastically, now clutching at her stomach.

"What? Now? But you're not due for.."

"Apparently that's not what the baby has in mind." She says with part of a smile and a look to her stomach. Then instantly a wash of ache ran through her body. She was leaning over so far I feared that she would fall almost vibrating from the pain.

I grab her gently trying to steady her and then help her quickly but carefully into the front of my car.

"The hospital is only ten minutes. away. Everything will be ok." I say trying to take her hand as we drove quickly down the road.

She pulls it away before I could grab it. Why? I'm just trying to help.

"Sorry, just hurting ALL OVER!" SHE SCREAMS.

I push on the gas as hard as I can, going at least 15 over the limit.

"Just breathe. Breathe." I say softly, just repeating what I had heard on one too many tv shows.

"Why didn't we take baby classes?" She says through strained breaths.

"It will all be ok." I say trying my best to soothe her.

"OF COURSE IT WILL ALL BE OK, FOR YOU! YOU'RE NOT PUSHING A BABY OUT OF YOUR BODY!" She screams at the top of her lungs.

I tried my best to ignore the yelling, knowing it was the intense pain and horomones. It just wasn't like her at all to ever raise her voice at me, and seeing her now, the intensity of her anger, the ruthlessness of her voice, I'm glad it didn't happen more often.

"I'm going to pull up and run in to get you a chair ok?" I say now not even a block away from the hospital.

She nods at me, the pain keeping her from saying anything.

I quickly pull into the drop off zone and then turn to her.
"I love you." I say, before quickly getting out of the car, leaving the engine running behind me.

KATE

I can do this. I can do this. Breathe. Breathe. Ignore the pain. Soon it will be over. Phil is getting the doctors. Soon l will have the baby. Our baby. Is this really happening? Am I really going into labor? Am I really going to have a child in the matter of a few hours?

I looked to the empty drivers seat where Phil had just been sitting. Phil. I think I love him. I think I belong with him, that we belong with him.

PAIN! HORRIBLE THROBBING INTENSE PAIN!

Just a contraction. I am fine. We are fine.

Ok. I'm ok. I can breathe again.

Is this the life I really want? A new house, a new baby a new almost everything? Breathe. Breathe.

Part of me was tempted to get out of the car. Was tempted to walk over to the drivers side. Tempted to drive. Drive as far as I could. Away. From everything new. Everything that has changed.

Breathe.

But before I could even move a muscle I see Phil running towards me a wheelchair and three doctors in tow.