Desperation.

Chapter 15

I wake up when Victor kisses my cheek.

"Good morning, chérie."

Chérie? That's French, isn't it?

"Good morning, Victor" I say and he smiles "What day is today?"

"It's Thursday. I have to go to school. Do you want to stay here and wait for me?" I hope he does.

"Sorry, but I have to go to university. See you later. I'll call you when I'm back, honey."

I nod and he kisses me. Then I go to the bathroom, take a shower and get dressed.

When I come back to my room Victor is already at university or at least on his way to university.

"Diana?"

"Yea Mum?"

"I have to talk to you."

Oh no. I think she wants to talk about Victor.

"What do you want to talk about?" I ask.

"Who's the guy who stayed here last night?"

I sigh. I hoped she wouldn't ask this question.

"Victor. He's my boyfriend." I answer quietly.

"Why didn't you tell me that earlier? I saw him when he left and he's a pretty and polite boy. He said 'good morning' and 'good bye' and 'thanks for having me'. You've never had a boyfriend who was as polite as Victor."

"Yea..." I mumble and add "See you later!"

I walk through the door so my mother can't ask more questions than I want to answer.

Rose is very excited when I arrive at school.

"What's up?" I ask and she says: "There's a party at Louis' and Zayn's house tomorrow! Zayn said that it will be great and everyone is there! Even Victor is invited!"

"But Louis doesn't like Vic..."

"That doesn't matter" Rose laughs "think about the party! Think about Louis' house! It will be amazing!"

"Yea... I hope so." I say.

"I don't want to go to school. Let's skip maths and go to Zayn and Louis."

But I am sceptical about this idea. Although I want to look into his eyes, I want to feel his lips on mine, I want to hear his voice and I want to be with him I can't go to Louis.

"No Rose. We shouldn't skip lessons. And apart from this point I don't want to be with them. Okay, I want to be with Louis but I can't. He's angry. He hates me."

"You know he doesn't." Rose whispers and I nod. What should I do? I don't want to cheat on Victor but I know I can't be with Louis without imagining to kiss him or without looking in his beautiful eyes.

Rose takes my hand and pulls me to Louis' house. Without asking me if I'm okay with this idea she rings the doorbell and we wait.

When Louis opens the door he's still in his boxers. Gosh, that looks so hot!

"Diana" he mumbles "What are you doing here?"

I decide to tell him that I'm just here because I don't want Rose to skip maths alone. When I say that he looks disappointed.

I'd love to tell him that he is one reason for me being here. But I can't say that because I don't want him to think that there's a chance for us.

It isn't. I love Victor and Victor loves me.

"Come in" Louis says and we follow him into the kitchen.

"Good morning" Zayn smiles while he's sitting on the table and is eating  cornflakes.

While Zayn and Rose are kissing I pull Louis out of the kitchen and ask "Are you still angry?"

He takes my hand and shakes his head.

"No, I'm not. But I hate seeing you with your new boyfriend." He pronounces this word like it was disgusting that I am in love with Victor. Okay, maybe it is. For him.

"But what should I do? I don't even know you, Louis."

He looks hurt but it's the truth.

"You don't know him, either."

"I do."

"You don't. Trust me."

"How can I know that I can trust you?"

"Just do." He looks into my eyes and I get this special feeling inside and I can't help but smile.

He pulls me closer to him and leans his face against mine.

I can smell his perfume. Oh my god I want to kiss him but I have a boyfriend.

Kiss him. My heart says.

Ignore him. My mind says.

My heart is stronger.

I kiss him and when my lips touch his lips I get this feeling. A whole firework is in my body and I pull him closer and closer and he seems to enjoy the kiss.

"Diana" he whispers when the kiss is over "Diana..."

I open my mouth to say something but he puts his finger on my lips.

"Don't say anything, Diana. I don't want to be hurt."

"I think I should go."

He nods and I kiss him for the last time.

Then I go out and I don't wait for Rose. That would be too much for me. I don't want to stay any longer at Louis' house.