//Chapter 9//

3.5K 85 12
                                    

How's it? 😬

-----------------

"Babe?... please look at me" she pleads. Trying to look at my face. But I refuse to look up, I don't want her to see me like this. So fragile and low. Broken. I've been gloating so much about how much I've changed my life around recently. About how well I'm doing. Making out I'm some strong, independent, strong minded girl these days. When clearly, I'm far from that. Every time I make progress, I get kicked back to the ground. Thrown back into the dirt. Where I belong.

Evelyn's so care free. She's always so happy and bubbly. She cant see me at my lowest. At my breaking point. But I Cant stop the quiet sobs now leaving my mouth, no matter how hard I'm trying. My head rests on her shoulder as she rubs my back slowly with her hand, trying to calm me down and telling me it's okay, "Are you hurt?" she asks examining me over quickly.

Yes, but not physically... I answer in my head. Which I think is worse. Physical pain I can deal with. There's medication for physical pain. There's nothing for heartache, for emotional suffering.

"Is it a guy?" she throws me another question as I ignored her first one. I look up quickly, she frowns down at me, giving me a small nod to say I-understand. I look back down to the floor, wrapping my arms around myself. I feel so cold all of a sudden, so exposed.
'It could be to do with the fact you're wearing a towel. Only a towel'... the voice in my head is back to throw the insults my way. Kicking me while I'm already down.

Evelyn breaks away from me, dropping her bag to the floor. She opens it, quickly taking something out "Where's your glasses?" she asks, looking around the room.

"I don't own any glasses" I manage a little giggle to myself. Does she not know me at all.
I glanced up towards the cupboards, wiping at my face and eye's to rid the evidence of my breakdown, but fresh tears are still falling down my face and escaping freely.

"Cups are in the top cupboard, over there" I point out to her. She's soon back over at my side, sat next to me on the floor again.
She passes me the cups to hold as she pours the vodka into each one. A good half a cup in each.
She place's the vodka down beside her on the floor, not bothering to screw the lid back on.
I think she's aiming for us to finish this bottle before we head out.
She takes a cup from me, grinning at me as she looks lifts the cup for me to cooy.
"To..." she begins a toast.

"A great night ahead of us?" I cut in with an unsure shrug.
"Yes" she smirks "And nothing but fun" she adds on.

I nod in agreement before we cling our cups together and guzzle down the clear liquid in the cups, like its water. We both finish our drinks at the same time. Coughing and both pulling weird, horrid, unattractive faces at each other from the affect.

"JESUS!" Eve shouts out as soon as she can fix a word together, as I just laugh at her.

It's been so long since I last drank this stuff. I used to drink it as though it was pop before. I've had a few drinks since I got cleaned up, but just the odd few beers. No spirits. Nothing hard core! The burning feeling is still present in my throat a minute or so after. How the hell did I manage to drink this shit, straight like that so much. It's vile!

"Some more?" Eve chirps up distracting me away from my alcoholic days.

"Set 'em up" I tell her, giving her a nod and a wide smile.

This drink goes down just as fast, if not faster than the last one. Well for me it did. I look over at Eve and she's struggling. Blowing out puffs of air, swirling the clear liquid round the cup.

"You're such a light weight" I tease. And that's enough encouragement for her to finish the drink in one mouthful. Squinting her eyes shut and taking the plunge. Making me appreciate this human being in my life right now. Actually needing her now.

//For Crying Out Loud...//  Matty Healy story!! (Completed) •IN EDITING•Where stories live. Discover now