Sanders Sides One Shots: Volume 1 [COMPLETED]

Afraid of Myself (Prinxiety)

Requested

Roman's POV:

I had made up my mind. I was going to tell Virgil my feelings for him. Was I nervous? You have no idea. I was literally shaking as I approached his door. Drawing in a breath, I knocked on the black door. I heard him call that I could come in, so I opened the door.

"Oh, hey Princey, what's up?" he asked, glancing up from his phone briefly. I looked at the ground, anxiously fidgeting.

"Uh, I-I kinda have s-something to tell you," I managed, earning a confused look from him. "I- uh, I have feelings for you..."

Virgil chuckled a little, making my heart jump into my throat. "Let me guess, feelings of hatred?" he asked skeptically. I blushed, rubbing the back of my neck worriedly. I shook my head.

"N-No, like, romantic feelings..."

Virgil froze up. He stared at me blankly. My heart was racing and my head was reeling. He bit his lip and looked away. "I don't like you back, Prince, sorry," he said, not meeting my eyes. My world seemed to start to shatter around me as he continued. "This isn't a happy fairytale where everyone has the same feelings for each other. I'm sorry."

There was silence. Silence was suffocating, and it shoved its way into the hole my heart just was moments ago. It was gone, ripped out. I knew there was a chance of him not feeling the same, but he could've simply said he didn't return my feelings...

I bit back the tears threatening to fall and choked down my sob. I smiled, thankful that Thomas was a great actor. "I-It's alright," I said, taking a few steps backwards toward the door. "I u-understand."

"Great, could you please leave?" he asked hastily. He stood up as I backed away even more. "I have work to do."

"Y-Yeah, okay, good luck with that," I told him, keeping my smile up the best I could. I left his room, bolting for my own as soon as his closed. Once inside, the tears fell. They fell like waterfalls streaming from my eyes. My chest was hurting as was my head. My throat would soon be raw and scratchy from crying as I let myself break down. I slid against my door, trying to become as small as possible. "W-Why d-did I-I d-do t-that..."

Virgil's POV:

As I closed the door, I heard Roman's footsteps retreat rather quickly. My chest constricted and I felt myself shaking. I leaned against the door, sliding down to the ground.

I hadn't meant a word.

I've had feelings for him for years, it's just that... I'm so scared... I'm afraid of what could go wrong. I'm scared of all the things I could do to mess it up. I'm terrified that I'd hurt him, but I guess I've already done that...

I let out a small sob as I hugged my knees. "W-Why d-did I-I d-do t-that..."

Third Person POV:

The next few days were the most miserable days of their lives. Roman had never felt more awkward around him, and Virgil was harsher and crueler to him than he ever was. He'd insult him for no apparent reason, while the prince remained awkwardly fidgeting and silent. He never said any comebacks, he didn't react, he just took it. On the inside, Virgil was falling apart. He'd made a huge mistake, and he didn't know what to do. He felt absolutely terrible for what he was doing to Roman, and cried himself to sleep three nights in a row. Not that the prince did any differently.

Virgil couldn't take it anymore. It was unbearable. He hurried down the hall and knocked on the prince's door before he could back out. A rough 'Come in' was called from the other side, leading him to pull open the door. He promptly shut it behind him and turned to face Roman.

"What do you require of me?" Roman asked softly, avoiding eye contact. Virgil's heart constricted as he realized just how badly he'd broken him. Without warning, he launched himself at him. He hugged the prince tightly and started sobbing. "Anxie-"

"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" he sobbed. "I didn't mean it! I do return your feelings!"

Roman's eyes were wide as he pulled away from the hug. He was thrilled, confused, and small bit scared that he might be playing around. "Why would lie about that?"

"I'm so scared, even sitting here right now. I'll mess it up! I always do! I'll hurt you! Look! I already have! I'm a monster! I'm not someone you'd want to be with!" he cried, tears making his makeup runny.

"Virgil, it's alright," the prince told him gently. He took his hand hesitantly in his. "Is- Is this okay?"

He nodded slowly. "Virgil, I understand your fears, but you've no need to fear yourself this way," Roman told him softly. He smiled a little. "Would like to give us a try? We can go slow, we won't rush anything."

Virgil nodded, a shaky smile finding its way onto his lips. "Y-Yes, I want to give us a chance."

That was all requested by this person:

Hope you still enjoyed that even though it was kinda depressing!