In the ancient realm there was a soul who was known widely as Hanguang-Jun.
He was known to be aloof and away from worldly beings. Seldom people knew him for who he was or what his heart truly yearned in reality.
A man who loved dearly and in retu...
A/n: (Here we have another sweet chapter through ZewuJun's POV. This chapter is special to me for various reasons. One that like many fans of MDZS and The Untamed, we will get to see in depth the feelings of another character who has huge influence on Wangji. He's not bad, maybe he is just scared like all of us. So I hope I do some kind of justice and you guys at the end would enjoy it.)
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Late that night, unable to sleep, I seek another soul who has always been with me. Trudging through the path, by the side are beautiful wild flowers and I smile. This is so opposite to his personality. Climbing the stairs, I know he is awake. He too like me has been unable to sleep. Especially these past three years.
How many nights have I knocked on his door and he has offered me warm tea.
"Come in Xi Chen" I hear a tired voice from behind the screen.
"Uncle" I greet as I enter his chamber, I join him on a mat next to his. He doesn't speak, as usual he pours a cup of warm tea for him and me.
"How is Wangji?" His voice is heavy and so is his soul.
"Missing him" is all I need to say. We both are aware of the weight Wangji is carrying on his shoulders.
"I heard what happened last night" he takes a sip and I watch his eyes droop in sadness. Not many would be able to guess but the anguish in Wangji hurts my uncle too "take some stash of medicine from my drawer, it is supposed to be the best. Apply it on Wangji".
"Yes uncle" I look at the moonlight filtering into the pristine white room and wonder is she as lonely as us too?.
"I am not a bad person, Xi Chen" his voice emits great torment "contrary to what many think, I can never hate Wangji" he looks at his hands and his gaze finds mine "these hands have raised him too, he is as much my son as he is of my brother's" he looks away "when that kid was an infant, my brother said his soul lies in Wangji, he asked me to protect him" uncle sighs "Xi Chen, do you think I enjoyed punishing Wangji? He bore the scars of it, but I too bore the brunt in my heart and soul. Every single one of those lashes, I shall carry it with me, even in my afterlife".
"Uncle" I whisper
"Xi Chen, do you know why I am this strict with Wangji?" his grip against the cup is so tight, his knuckles are bare white "you and Wangji, look so similar, but his soul is like that of his father. They're replica of eachother. Not only their souls but heart too." uncle pauses and looks straight at me "both fell in love young and lost too. The reason I despise Wei Wuxian was not out of personal enmity, he was a child too, afterall, but his personality was like that of your mother's. I knew the day Wangji met him, he fell in love with Wei Wuxian and I was scared, scared that Wangji would choose to be like your father" he looks away and coughs out the emotions he hid within him "and I was right".
"Uncle, please don't blame yourself" I try to soothe his heartache. Never did I realise that he felt so deep. A man who stood strong for us also has a heart of gold.
"I am thankful to that child Wangji brought with him from Yiling, Sizhui. He has kept Wangji rooted to the soils of Gusu. If not for that child, Wangji would have become either a recluse or..." Uncle does not finish his sentence but I realise the meaning, he would have joined Wei Wuxian.
"Was that the reason you allowed Sizhui to study here?"
He nods just once.
"Wangji won't ever love anyone" I try to wipe the tear subtly from my eyes. Knowing him, he won't ever.
"Xi Chen?"
"Yes Uncle?"
"Did you give Wangji his possession back?" and as shocked as I am, I quickly turn to look at him "You knew?"
He nods.
"Yes" I murmur.
"Good, maybe now he shall receive some solace. I won't ever ask you what were the contents, but if that can bring back our Wangji, then so be it".
He pours us another cup and in silence we sit.
"I know you're not bad, Uncle" I answer his previous point "and so does Wangji".
He shakes his head "Wangji, might know I am not bad but that won't make him forgive me. After all I too, took part in ripping away Wei Wuxian from his life. I am equally responsible towards that child. He's not the only one repenting" uncle smiles sadly.
Rest of the night, has each of us wallowing in our sorrow quietly. Just as I leave, uncle calls my name "Xi Chen, when Wangji feels better, ask him to come and meet me".
"Uncle" I start to say but he stops me.
"Xi Chen, when you reach my age, my mere words won't bring comfort to Wangji. I have sinned against that poor child too. So please" his heavy gaze makes me realise how much pain my uncle has undergone.
I nod and bow.
Leaving his quite place, I walk the path that I have trudged in these three years.
Jingshi.
Knowing my brother is just beyond, all alone and in immense distress, there is nothing I could do but hope, one day, we can come out of this pain.
