Goddess of Light

Chapter 24 ~ The Dangerous Plan

I woke the next day when the light streamed through my curtains.

I was still clutching on to the phone, it being my comfort. Thor had Jane. There was only one other person who was going through the same exact situation as me, no matter what he says. Loki. And I needed to see him. And not just an illusion, I needed to go down there and be with him. 

I looked down at my hands which appeared to be clean. I pulled myself from the bed and reached down to the pile of gowns on the floor and picked up the nearest one, pulling it on. I pulled my scraggly hair into bun on top of my head to hide the knots. I went to the wash basin and splashed cold water on my face to help the appearance of my puffy eyes. I then walked down the the dungeons, without looking at a single person that walked by me. 

I walked down the dark stone steps to the dungeon and was relieved to see that they had cleared the floor of bodies. All the other cells were deserted, everyone who had escaped was dead. Thank Odin that Loki didn't escape, or I would have been torn apart twice in one day. 

I walked towards his cell, but I guard interrupted me. "Princess, you are not permitted to be down here." He insisted. 

"Open the cell for me, or I will make sure you will never see the light of day again. And if you tell anyone that I was down here I will make it my personal mission to slit your throat. Just give me 10 minutes with him." I threatened as the guard nodded and made his way to the control panel of Loki's cell, allowing me to enter before closing it behind me. 

I didn't even know that he knew as I saw him seated on the bed reading a book. He looked up when I entered the cell, clearly surprised to see me. He put down the book. 

"Mother, she-"

"I know." He sighed as he stood up. 

I didn't believe that Loki was this put together during this time. There was no way. Mother and I were the only people in the galaxy that really understood him, and I knew that I was seeing an act, an illusion. 

"Drop it." I ordered as he looked at me confused. "The illusion, drop it."

He sighed and the room around him dissolved into disarray. The furniture was scattered, broke, around the floor and there were scuff marks all over the walls from where he had clearly thrown the furniture. Pages from the books that we gave him were torn up and strewed all over the floor. 

My eyes then moved to the dishevelled appearance of my brother. He looked just as broken as me. And strangely, this calmed me. I looked into his dark, defeated eyes and shared his anguish. 

I didn't say another word as I sat down next to him on the floor and leant my head on his sunken shoulders. We lay there for a while, comfortable with the silence as we mourned our mother together. 

"I told it where to go." He muttered, causing me to lift my head up and look at him confused. "It's my fault. It's my fault she is dead." He whispered as a tear streamed down his cheek. 

I saw his despair as I searched his face for meaning. He may have told that beast where to go and given him a head start, but they would have tried to get to Jane no matter what and it would be an insult to my mother's memory to say that she wouldn't have sacrificed her life for Jane's, time and time again. 

"It's okay." I whisper to him as my voice breaks. "Malekith would have tried to find Jane no matter what and I believe that she would have sacrificed her life for Jane's. It wasn't my fault, and it wasn't your fault, Loki. We owe her the respect of her decision."

"I don't want to rot in here. I can't bare the idea that I wasn't able to protect her because I was stuck in here." He mumbled. 

It was at that moment that I realised he needed more help than I did with this grief. His last words to her were him telling her that she wasn't his mother. He must think about that while I think about her laying there, dead.