Goddess of Light

Chapter 80 ~ An Actual Plan

I wandered over to Tony who looked slightly nervous about the prospect of speaking to me after so long, a feeling he wasn't experiencing alone.

I waited for him to speak for a moment before sitting down on what could have been stairs before the planet had been destroyed. I slumped down and rested my chin on my palms, looking up at him, hoping he would break the tension with his usual need to speak his mind.

He locked eyes with me and gave me a knowing look. A look that told me exactly what he was thinking.

It seemed like a lifetime ago when the Avengers fell apart and the reasons for it seemed somewhat settled, but Tony had been the one we hurt the most and the conflict between our previously amicable relationship hadn't been solved.

"Did you know?" Tony asked, looking back at the floor as I was struck with guilt. I knew from Steve that the real issue led in the fact that Bucky had killed his parents and that Steve knew about it and didn't tell Tony.

I had also known about it for a while and that secret had nibbled away at my conscience, hoping to relieve Tony of some pain, but unintentionally caused him even more.

I knew it was time to come clean about it and hope he wouldn't try and kill me before Thanos had the chance.

"Yes." I muttered after inhaling a deep breath and holding it, apprehensive of his reaction.

He looked back, his hurt and betrayal evident in his eyes. I brought my eyes down to my feet, exhaling as I prepared myself to succumb to whatever anger Tony may need to let out.

"Why didn't you- No. I get it. You kept his secret." He spoke again after another couple of moments of silence.

I looked back to his gaze, and he looked slightly less hurt. "It wasn't my secret to tell." I murmured back, starting to pick at the skin around my fingernails.

"You know, after a while, the secret itself becomes irrelevant, but the fact that you kept it, does not." He sighed and my face fell with guilt.

I had done just as much hurt to Tony as Steve had in protecting his secret and Bucky. I was just as guilty. It was a feeling I had been trying to leave at the bottom of my stack of problems, but the tower was toppling and all my problems were all over the place.

I had an opportunity to fix it here and now.

"I'm sorry, Tony. For everything." I apologised, looking directly into his solemn eyes.

The hint of a smile then curled at the corner of his mouth. "Listen, I didn't call you over to argue with you over someone else's secret, I called you over here because I wanted to check if you were all good going into this." He walked closer, the hurt in his eyes changing into worry.

My expression turned defensive as he sat down a few steps below me, kicking his feet up, reclining against a wall.

I knew that a lot had happened over the past few days and if I was a normal person, I probably would have crumbled amongst the destruction, but I wasn't a normal person.

I was fine. I could handle this. As soon as it was over, I would more than happily open the floodgates to my unprocessed grief and let myself drown, as long as I had got my revenge.

"What do you mean? Did Maja put you up to this? Or Quill?" I snapped, crossing my arms over my chest.

"No one... Well, Maja did tell me what happened to you, with your sister and then Thanos killing half your people... I'm guessing that's not even the end of it. I just wanted to check in. I know one or two things about trauma." He explained with a cheeky smile, surprising me with his compassion.