Jaylor One Shots

Some Space To Think About All Of This

They're moving too fast. Her mind is going a million miles a minute. Everything that's going on in general is overwhelming. But Joe. God she's falling for him, Taylor can feel herself wanting to be with him all day, everyday. But that's completely terrifying to her. She's so scared that she's being blinded by her feelings for him to see the bigger picture. She's so scared he'll leave her. She pulls her knees up to her chest and sighs, staring out the large window, rain pelting down. Inside, it's warm. She's got her hot cup of coffee cradled in her hands as her mind goes into overdrive. The entire world hates her right now. Everything just seems to be going wrong. And then there's Joe. It's almost an endless spiral for her right now. Hate. Wrong. Joe. It's all she can think about, the walls around her seem to be closing in and it scares her. It scares her because he seems to really care about her, despite everything else. That in itself is dangerous. 

After a while of thinking, a long while, she hears his footsteps coming up behind her. He sits down next to her on the window seat, neither of them saying anything for a moment before he pulls her into his lap, her back pressing against his chest, his head resting on her shoulder, nuzzled into the crook of her neck, his arms wrapped around her waist from behind. And just like that, all her fears and torment seemingly vanish. Taylor has no idea how he has that effect on her. He just does, and that also scares her. Are they moving too fast? Is she being blinded by fake nicety? Or is this the realest, most wonderful thing that's happened to her in a long time? And just like that, Taylor comes to a conclusion. 

"I need to say something." She says softly, linking her fingers through his. He presses a kiss to her shoulder 

"You can say anything." He murmurs, seeming so assured of everything. She takes a deep breath, squeezing his hand. 

"I really care about you, like a lot. I need you in my life, I really do, honestly. I just..." She pauses for a moment, trying to find a delicate way to say this. The last thing she wants is for him to get angry, or hurt by this. "I think I need some time, and a little bit of space to just think about all of this on my own. Because with you here...everything is so perfect. I feel an overwhelming amount of warmth with you. But I just need to be able to be sure that it's completely pure, that I'm not being blinded by something." She pauses again, biting her lip and gently rubbing the back of his hand with her thumb. Much to her surprise, he's still got his arms around her and he appears to be listening intently. "I can't even really explain it but I just need a little bit of time alone, in this house, to really understand what I'm feeling. I need a chance to miss you. Because before I can let you fully in, I just need to be sure. Everything in the outside world is so insane, I just need to step back from this bubble for a moment to think. I'm sorry, I must sound so insane." She shakes her head, her eyes focused on their hands, unable to turn around and look at him. 

"You don't sound insane. In fact, I think I get it. It's okay, I remember you always made it clear that we needed to take things slow. And if you need some time to yourself for a little while, I'll stay in a hotel. It's completely fine, I promise love. I'm not going anywhere. You can text and call me anytime okay?" She feels him press a kiss to her head and she sighs, a wave of relief washes over her. 

"Okay. Thank you for understanding." Taylor lets go of his hand to turn around to face him. 

"Of course, anything you need. I'm literally one call away if you want me to come over, even if you just need a hug for a few minutes. I'll be here." She smiles, grabbing his hand again. 

"You're sure this is okay? I know it's odd to tell someone you care about them and are so incredibly happy with them and then basically kick them out." Joe presses his lips to hers and she feels her worries melt away again. 

"I'm sure love. I understand." He speaks softly, his ocean blue eyes filled with empathy and kindness which makes her smile. He wraps his arms around her, pulling her head into his chest. She melts into his embrace, she knows she's going to miss him, she's going to miss this. But she knows this time she needs to be more cautious, doing this is for the best. It won't be for long.