Jaylor One Shots

Dancing With Our Hands Tied

Taylor slides into the back of her car, letting out a sigh escape her lips as the car begins to move. She puts her earbuds, allowing the music to wash over her as her driver takes her to a private gym. As they pull up outside, she sees the swarm of paparazzi waiting for her and immediately her blood runs cold. She's honestly terrified. She hasn't been seen for so long and it's allowed her to take a step back from everyone else's opinion. This really is the last thing she needs today. But she can't avoid is, so after sucking in a deep breath she opens the door, stepping out of the car and keeping her head down as she rushes towards the doors of the gym. The screaming begins, she knows they're trying to get a reaction out of her and today they've decided to comment on her body. That always hits a nerve and she can feel her heart beating faster. Can she seriously not do anything without them commenting on it?!

"Taylor! Looks like you've gained a few!"

"Over here! Care to comment on the weight you've gained?!"

"Woah Taylor, looking a little bit heavy don't you think?" The comments just don't stop but she refuses to acknowledge any of them. Once she's safely behind closed doors, she can feel her anxiety properly heighten - she almost wants to just lock herself in the bathroom and cry. But she can't do that, so she sucks in a few deep breaths before shoving her feelings down before going through her workout. 

It isn't until she's back in her car again that she begins to feel the tidal wave of anxiety wash over her again. Her fingers are itching to write so she asks her driver politely to take her to her studio instead of home. 

Once she's inside and alone, she feels tears slipping down her cheeks. She sits down on the floor with her head in her hands. She had known people would notice, had known there would be comments. She was stupid to think they wouldn't be shouted directly at her - that it wouldn't affect her so horribly. She's just started to overcome an eating disorder and this has thrown a real spanner in the works. Of course they didn't know about that - even if they did it would only fuel them. Anytime they see something different they pull at it, determined to sell a story - anything for a good shot of her loosing it. 

It terrifies her that if they can be so cruel and horrible about her weight and how her body looks - how bad will it be when the world finds out about the relationship she's been hiding for months now? What will they do to him? To them? Tears are flowing freely down her face, her arms wrapped firmly around her body. Joe doesn't deserve to deal with any of this, he has no idea what's coming - despite promising he'll be okay with it all. She knows all of this and yet she hasn't quite been able to let him go - to protect him. She feels as though her hands are tied, if you love someone, you have to let them go. But god she's struggling with the 'letting them go' part. She's remembered today that she just can't love him without the world commenting on it - on him. She's worked so hard to keep their relationship hidden but she knows it'll come out eventually and it'll be better for her to just make him leave before they find out. She feels words forming in her head so she grabs one of her many guitars, slowly strumming a gentle melody. 

"I...I loved you in secret." She mutters before pulling out her phone to record what she's doing. As she starts writing the song, her tears slowly dry. She's beginning to come to the conclusion that it's time to end things with Joe - before things go bad. Before the media gets a hold of it, before the world ruins it. He still has the chance at a good life without her, all she seems to do is ruin things.

"25 years old, oh how were you to know?" Their love has been beautiful, he always tells her how much he cares for her, how much he loves her. He'd truly helped her heal through one of the toughest times in her life - had done it all without a single ounce of judgement. 

"Deep blue but you painted me golden." As the memories from their relationship flood through her mind, she keeps telling herself that breaking things off is the responsible thing to do. They could part ways cleanly, with no bad stuff - no tabloids or rumours. Just the memories of all the good times they'd shared the past four months.