Jaylor One Shots

I Blew Things Out Of Proportion

Taylor sits at the kitchen counter, her head in her hands, breathing heavily. Things had gotten out of hand tonight. She hadn't meant to get so worked up or jealous, it had just...happened. When she screamed for Joe to leave her house and thrown his phone and shoes at him, she hadn't expected him to just leave. She hadn't expected him to be so willing to accept her breakup threats. She hadn't wanted to lose him tonight, not really. But she had. He was gone. Tears are rolling down her cheeks now as the reality of what she'd done set in and hit her like a tidal wave. The person who she loved more than anything in the world was gone, and it was her fault. She'd caused it. Her body is wracked with sobs and as she tries to get up and take a few steps, she falls to the ground. She curls up into a ball, her vision blurry as she wraps her arms around her own body, praying for Joe to come back and tell her he loved her. Tell her he wasn't actually leaving her.

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Taylor gasps and sits upright, her heart beating erratically in her chest. She'd had a nightmare, one she didn't quite understand but had terrified her more than anything. She looked over to Joe's side of the bed, quickly realising he wasn't there. The events of earlier that night flooded back into her mind and she found herself more worked up than before. Her hands shook as she swings her legs over the side of the bed, trying to suck in more air through deep breaths that she is struggling to maintain. Taylor reaches up, pushing her sweaty hair off her forehead and stands up on shaky legs, forcing herself to walk downstairs and get some water. Her chest feels constricted and she knows what this means, she's on the verge of a very large panic attack. In an effort to calm herself down, she focuses on counting by 3's. It was something to focus her mind on, rather than the extremely overwhelming thoughts riddling her mind. 

Taylor pours herself a glass of water, sipping it slowly before sighing. The threat of having a full blown panic attack is gone, and now she just feels miserable. Why on earth did she have to attack him over a conversation he'd had with a friend. Just because it was a girl didn't mean anything. She'd been pissed because he's told his friend stuff he hadn't told him, so unfortunately her mind had blown things out of proportion and now...now he's gone. Her chest feels heavy, her mood sinking lower than it has in a long time. She's not even crying anymore, she just feels empty. Lost. Alone. It's her own fault, she knows that but she still hadn't expected him to just leave. Why the hell did she have to yell at him to get out of her house and out of her life, that she never wanted to see him again? None of that was true, it never would be. She loves him with all of her heart, now he's gone. It still doesn't seem real to her, it can't be. If it is, she knows she won't survive. He's helped put her back together after one of the darkest times in her life. She knows already that that won't even come close to how she's feeling about this, how long it'll take her to recover, if ever at all. 

Taylor picks up her phone where she'd left it on the kitchen counter earlier, scrolling through it until she finds her recent messages with Joe. 

J - I love you, see you soon 

That was the last thing he'd sent her. He'd been gone for three weeks at that point and was hopping on a flight home to see her. God, things got so fucked up. Her finger hovers over the call button but she can't do it, dropping her phone quickly on the counter, aggressively dropping her head in her hands and sighing, her shoulders slumping forward. Sleep tugs at Taylor but she doesn't want to go back to bed, knowing that she'll be alone and waking up more miserable than she is right now. God, she'd fucked up.

After sitting at the kitchen counter for like twenty minutes, she forced herself to go upstairs, back to bed. She pulls the covers up above her head, and hugs Joe's pillow to her body, breathing in his lingering scent. Taylor allows herself to be lulled to sleep through the false sense of security brought to her by the intoxicating smell of Joe.