When Love Gets in the Way

Chapter Eighty-five

James

It's got to get worse before it gets better.

The last few months have been a struggle for everyone. They're the months where everyone starts to heal but it sure did take a lot of time.

Everything started out fine at first. Luca found a nice woman to foster him and he was enrolled into a different school which Oliver also decided to attend.

We were allowed to have date nights and Seb and I were even getting close to persuading Luca to go to therapy. Then a boy named George decided to get involved. I don't know the full details of what happened but it ended in George being in a bad state and Luca losing his foster family due to him being uncontrollable.

Rosa and Becky spent a lot of time taking Luca out while I was busy studying and to be honest, I think my neglect could have become part of the problem.

After losing one home, Luca gave up hope. He lied about attending school and in the end he never stayed with a foster family for more then two months. Fights with random people were becoming more and more regular and I could tell that the fear he felt towards himself was tearing him apart.

Yet I still did nothing.

I believed that Luca's mental state had moved on passed my help so all I did was attempt to get him to seek help. I never comfored him like I should have or told him that I still loved him no matter what.

It was a spiral. Things just kept leading to things getting worse and worse until things for Luca had gotten so bad that he felt like he couldn't rise.

I still remember the day Seb called me in the middle of my English class to break the news to me.

"I'm in class Seb." I had hissed as my whole class watched with curious expressions. Usually, I wouldn't answer the phone in school but with everything going on with Luca, I wanted to always be informed.

"Luca's in hospital." Seb had told me, his voice shaking slightly. At first I thought it was from anger. I thought that Luca had gotten into a fight with someone stronger then him and had come out the beaten one this time.

"Why? What's happened?" I had asked already planning to visit him after school.

"Oliver found him in the school bathroom. He overdosed on some sort of drug." Seb had explained and that's when I realised that his voice wasn't shaking with anger. It was shaking with fear and sorrow.

"What?" Was all I could say.

"He tried ta kill himself James."

I didn't wait around to finish the school day or even that English class. I left straight after and rushed to the hospital to find Luca. He was still unconscious when I arrivd but they allowed me to wait in his room so I'd be a familiar face for him when he woke up.

I can't remember how long it took but it felt like forever. When he woke up, he cried. At first he tried to make a joke of it but once he realised that he wasn't just brushing it off, he cried a lot.

A few days later, his foster family gave up on him again leading him back into the cycle. Luckily, my mother had a friend who is a fully trained therapist meaning that Luca would get her private sessions for a large discount. It was a struggle getting him to go but once he did, I think it did him good to talk through everything that's ever happened to him. He was diagnosed with trauma PTSD and depression which are challenging but not impossible to deal with.

Ever since that point, it been about building the world back around us one block at a time.

Months have passed and now I'm starting my first year at college. Despite all of the stress Becky and I have overcome this past year, we both passed our GCSE's as some of the top students in the country.

Life is improving and I know that but I can't help but worry sometimes. I like to text Luca when he's at school despite phones being band and I like to call him sometimes when my anxiety gets a little too much and I fear that he's on the edge again. He promised me he wouldn't and I know I can trust him in my heart, it's just my extreme imagination trying to hurt me like always.

Everything will continue to get better and I know that we'll all have each other through the rough times. All of us: Luca, Becky, Rosa, Seb and Oliver will fight together and provide the love we all need.

"What ya doin?" Luca asks curiously as he pucks the diary from my hands and holds it close to his face. Despite his struggles, Luca's reading has been gradually improving so I don't doubt he'll be able to understand what I've written.

"It's a diary." I explain as I take it back from him and place it in the draw.

"Why were ya tellin it all that crap?" He asks and I can tell that the reminder of the events prior this moment still effect him in a way I'll never fully understand.

"So we can look back on it in the future and see how much progress we've made." I tell him and he smirks making me feel self conscious of the idea.

"That's fuckin sick. We'll be we rich and read it and remember how we got together." He says with a wide genuine smile. I've missed that smile but now thankfully he's found the happiness within to release it once more.

"Thanks." I say. "How are you and Garrett getting on?" I ask and Luca sighs before nodding to something inside of his own head.

"Good. He's better then the other fuckers." He tells me and I nod. After months of searching for a new family, Garrett stept forward to take Luca in. He explained that he's fostered younger children before but with the unpredictable hours of his work, he couldn't be there to constantly look after them. Luca's independent so that isn't an issue any more. Besides, they already know each other.

"I'm glad we're both here right now." I say and he nods.

"A few months back I wouldn't agree with ya." Luca states and I frown as I try to ignore the familiar prickle of anxiety.

"What about now?" I asks him.

"What about today?" He sings back causing us both to laugh.