Justin

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"Well here's what I have on her. She has a little juvenile record for drugs and theft. No record as an adult. She has the 4 year old with reformed addict. Dude is actually now a pastor. She has her own legit business and her licenses are up-to-date. She did tell the truth, Clive did cut ties with Cease. But there was never a way to connect her to Cease at all. I got reason to believe you can trust shorty." C told me. I sat there and took that in as we sat in the car outside the studio.         "Man...cool. I thought when you called that it was on some whole other shit. But I know you're thorough with shit, that's why I brought it to you."                    
"You already know bruh! I'mma make sure before I let you walk into anything blind for real." he said as we shook hands. I actually came here to pick up Riek, but this news from C-Money eased my mind a little bit too. "But she's a good look for you though. Maybe what you needed was somebody older." he said. I nodded.                          "Maybe so. I mean she's different for sure, but honestly Dom wasn't bad though." I admitted to him.                         
"We know that bruh. But maybe yall just weren't good for each other is all. You can be the total package at the wrong address." I liked how he put that. Riek started coming over. "Imma let yall slide. Hit me up though G." he said.      
"Fa sho bruh." I said as he slid out and Riek hopped in the whip.
"What's good Jay?" he said as we started on our way to the gym.                                                         "Shit, I can't call it." I said to him.            
"I see you finally put use to the number. It takes a minute to come to the realization about shit." he said to me.     
"Man...that's facts. I just didn't even know where to begin. I can't believe you went through this shit more than once my guy. This rough." I said to him.             
"It is, but you gotta train your mind to be stronger than your feelings. At the same time, it takes time. I actually went to them group sessions and shit. It sounds crazy til you realize other people can sometimes be your strength. Listen, you're what 18-19. About to graduate, preparing for college and then Boom! this happens. Don't let it define your life. I'm only a lil older than you dawg, but that lil extra experience taught me a lot. Patience and understanding. You go to church?" he asked me.                                      "Not like I used to, but I go."                        
"Okay, so you're not super religious. I will tell you, prayer helps, but you still have to put in work. First thing is stop blaming yourself for this." I looked over at him. "You don't have to say it. We all have blamed ourselves at a point. It's not our fault. Next thing is relating. We didn't carry the child, she did. Her hurt is more intense than ours can ever be. I mean...yall broke up, but she's still your partner in this. I know you have Suki and she has Kev but maybe the 4 of yall can do group. It might seem weird, but yall are in it together essentially."              
"Man...I hear you, but that's awkward."
"For who? Kev already goes with Dom. You can't ask Suki to go with you?" he asked me and I dreaded that.                    
"I could, but I don't know if that's too much for her for real."                                   
"Be real G, it's too much for you. She already does Dom's nails, they're good. Kev, is a cool dude. Had yall have met differently, yall would be friends. So that leaves you and Dom. So who is it?"            
"D don't wanna deal with me."                  
"You haven't let go yet." he said to me. I just kept driving. "So why you break up with her if you're still in love?" he asked me. I looked over.                 "Transparent moment...I got jealous of her newfound fame. I felt like I took a L to that. Then I found out about her being gay before me. How the fuck I'mma compete with that? The blogs find out and every lesbian, bisexual, curious broad gone be at her. On top of the niggas...I'm not taking myself through that shit." he nodded at that.    
"I get it, but then that means this is personal. Jay you need more than group for this. Sounds like you need to deal with your own insecurities. I'm not saying I know everything about Dom, but I never saw her about anybody but you when yall were together. Now seeing her with Kev, same thing. That's in your head G. I'm no expert but I took some classes and to be real, I think you might be using these women to fill a void. I don't know if it's your mom or your dad that you're attempting to fill in a hole from. But you gotta sort that out." I parked at the gym and let that sink in.  
"Kev told me the same thing." I said to Riek. "Maybe yall right."                               
"I'm just saying. I'm all for the gym because releasing endorphins gives you a natural high and it helps. But you gotta do a little more for your mental strength on everything. But for real bruh, you not a bad dude, you just been through some bad shit. Remember that when you're mentally battling that shit. Because on the real, I got 3 baddies. If I allowed my feelings to control me, I would be single and the 3 of them would have each other. Be that nigga, even if the only person who believes it is you." he said and that hit me.                      
"Bruhhh...you gotta teach me the game on that." We both laughed at that.             
"Listen, I'm born and bred like this. But truthfully, it just happened. I'm confident, they're confident so there's no issues at all. As long as everyone has the same common goal, shit is smooth as fuck. Remember that part. You are your own best friend and worst enemy in life. Because whether you believe you can or cannot, you're right. Think about it." Yeah...I think I like this nigga Riek. He calm, cool, and collected. Gives real ass advice and doesn't back down from awkward shit.

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