The Unusual Suspects Book 2

Dom

"Wait...how did I not know this?" I said as I was sitting in the studio stunned for a moment. I swear I must be in my own lil world entirely too much because I never knew any of this.         "Girl...I never spoke on it, but it's in my music. I've always been an open relationship until marriage type of person. Like marriage is sacred, but everything leading up to it is an experience. I might be in my head like yeah I wanna be with Dox, because I do. But I also wanna know what it would be like one night with whomever. I want to experience that before I know for sure that I'm choosing the right option. You get what I'm saying?" Onyx asked us.                                 "I do. That's why I tell anyone I believe in freedom in love. Like we can always add to our situation but take away if we see fit. I don't want to hold onto someone who doesn't want that, but I also don't want to not experience something because I'm being held to a social concept that doesn't quite make sense." Araya said.                                                                                                              "Plus I think it may be a hard concept for those to grasp if they grew up in a traditional home with both parents. That's your norm, but for the rest of us, not really." Depth said.                                "Maybe you're right. My dad treated my mother like a queen and that set the tone for me. One woman, queen treatment. So I always looked at love one way. But I see other things happen and it can still be healthy looking at you all." Iris said.                                                                                                    "What about you D, what do you think?" Onyx asked me and they all looked at me.                              "I mean clearly I'm not straight, so I never felt the need to conform to the standard. But I do believe you can love more than one person at a time. I don't think that I can personally, because I feel like I love too deeply for that." I told them.                                                                                                      "Aww so you really do love bruh?" Araya said to me.                                                                                              "I do. Maybe I don't really show it enough or let on, but I do. Shit he been here for me in ways that not even my brother has and y'all know how I feel about Martin. But I can't even really see myself with someone else. Not like this anyway." I looked over and Depth had tears in her eyes and so did Iris. "Y'all better fuckin not." I said and they both started laughing and wiping their faces. I really wasn't sure how we stumbled across this.                                                                                      "I'm with them, I have never heard you really speak on your feelings. I think that touched me too." Onyx said as she was patting her eyes as well.                                                                                            "Y'all be trying to play me." I said with a laugh.                                                                                                       "Whatever! I have feelings just like the rest of y'all. I just don't express them right." I said defending myself in the moment.                                                                                                                               "You got feelings, but you don't express them like the rest of us. Baby listen I will literally crash the fuck out over Chuckie." Iris said and we laughed. "...no for real though. That's my twin flame, my other half, hell my better half. I'll kill over that man. But that's why I'm so passionate about stuff when it comes to him. I feel like you would never be the type. Not that you don't love like that, but you don't express like that. I'm not saying that's wrong, but you just seem so calm, cool, and collected. When you express things it's shocking." Iris finished.                                                   "And I don't know if I'm able to be that person. Like...I've been through some shit and I'm not sure that I can ever be that vulnerable with someone anymore." I admitted.                                         "What happened to you?" Onyx asked me, I looked around and all eyes were on me.                        "If I told that story, everybody would be crying. Trust me, you don't wanna hear it."                       "No pressure obviously, but maybe we do wanna know. Like I know you have another side in you and it's not fair to you to have to constantly hide it." Depth said.                                                             "So back in Detroit...the first girl I ever dated...Mya. She always seemed like my dream girl, I was surprised when out of all the girls she seemed to be fixated with me. When I was with her, she made me feel so high like I was the biggest superstar in the world. We were so close...well I thought, like in love like writing poems and sending song lyrics and all that high school shit. She was my world, but then, I had popped up at her house one day and this girl was there with her and she was really reciting my poetry to her, like it was her work. The playlist I shared with her, she shared with the other girl. She literally used me to bag another female. I was hurt as hell, but I blamed myself for it because I didn't see the signs. Then I got with the next girl...Kendra. She was rugged, different and I fell for the down-on-her-luck thing. I kept helping her with schoolwork, clothes, I would get her hair done, kept her looking fly and all that. She was a stud so I thought she'd be different. Til I caught her giving head to this dude for some pills. I was in love with an addict. Then found out she burned me, I was faithful to a whore and got burned. Came here and fell for Justin...y'all know how that played out. Love is the scariest thing in the world to me. Like I love Kev, from the bottom of my heart I do, but he scares the shit out of me." I really couldn't believe I shared that with them.                                                                                                       "You carry yourself so well though. I never would've thought it." Araya said as she walked up and hugged me. They were all crying for real as I knew they would.                                                              "But that's it...that's my story. I've always been half-loved and I can't half-love. So it's my own lil Hell in my heart." I said.                                                                                                                                                         "But girl...trust me it's not the same now. Influx really loves you. Wholeheartedly." Depth said.        "I hope he really does." I said softly.