Refraction.

Character.

His character is so beautiful,
But I ponder
Whether a character is what he is.
I don't doubt the kindness and warmth
That he exhibits day after day,
But I do notice - when people aren't looking -
The light in his eyes seems to fade.
It only takes a request for his attention
To reignite that lost spark,
But I find myself wondering how much of the man
Is simply a performance;
Is the whole world nothing more than his stage?
He is fascinatingly peculiar, lovable yet strange,
And still I worry that he is trying too hard.
Perhaps he wants others to enjoy themselves,
Or even just to entertain,
But I see his eyes and I don't know what to say.
Does he know that he is enough?
I wish I could explain my loyalty and desire,
But I still don't know what to say.
It's impossible to know what's happening in his mind,
Whether he is hurt, lonely, or just
Exhausted with the mundanity of our lives...
Whatever it is, I wouldn't care for him any less.
If only I could get close enough to understand,
And yet I am simply watching from the outside,
Just looking as the madness unfolds,
Questioning whether I can be with him.