Refraction.

A Thousand Times.

The acoustic guitar; another sad song -
I've been here before,
But that was a long time ago.
It feels as though a lifetime has passed
Since I last cried night into day.
It's not an achievement, I know,
For a man who does not cry is scarcely
Worthy of being human;
What man, what fool, what beast,
Would celebrate abstaining from the very thing
That makes us all the same.
I shall rue the day that I cry my last,
But now, as I weep, I do wish I could stop.
To love, to heal - I will never pretend it isn't hard.
Maybe I shall be a better man for it,
But even if not,
I am so very grateful that I had a love
Worth grieving for; the sort of love from which
Both open prose and sonnets are born,
For I don't know how I'd be if I'd never had it.
Perhaps a little less broken,
But colder, harsher - I would have been
Somebody else entirely, and thus I cannot regret
The warmth of his eyes, the first time he kissed me,
The first time he said he loved me and truly meant it.
I would die a thousand times over
Than pretend that I don't care, that his love wasn't
Worth all of the heartbreak.
I would do it all again, a thousand times more -
The tentative beginning, the passion, our laughter
Drowning out the CRT television;
The flames, the tears, the last kiss that we shared...
I would die a thousand times over
Just to be with you once more.