The Aftermath

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It was the coke that started it. Then the bottle of Jacks and champagne. I'm not even sure why I opened that bottle, it was there for some occasion. Maybe an anniversary or something. Then I felt lonely. So I invited some people over. Do I know them? Fuck no. But they are bodies in my house who want to party, and that's all I wanted. They bought drugs with them, and that made me happy. For a brief moment.

11am Monday morning. The sun is bright. Too bright for my drugged up, hungover eyes. Someone's glasses are on the counter, mine now. Bodies are sprawled across the house in every room, I know I wasn't wearing this when it started, I don't even think it's mine. The outside doesn't look any better, more people in the yard, most in their underwear. I woke next to some naked bodies in my bed, I can only assume I had sex last night until we blacked out. I don't feel happy now. I don't feel anything. Fuck.


Phone dings, there are multiple missed calls and texts. A couple from Joe, but mainly Adam. One from Jay, another from Lisa.

"Hey, I fucked up" I say as the call is answered

"How bad we talking? Do we need to bury a body?"

"I don't think so, but it is a body removal situation"

"How many?"

"I haven't counted, but there's a lot"

"I'll be by soon"

"Thanks Kim" I finish and hang up. I quickly text Lisa to confirm I won't be in the office today as not well. I instead take a long shower and wait for Kim to get here.


"Yikes" Kim says, entering through the front door, stepping over a passed-out stranger. "How do you know these people?"

"I don't. You put the word out and they come" I answer, sipping on a bourbon coffee

"Nice top" she points out, motioning to the embroidered butterfly pink top I was wearing

"Thanks, it's not mine"

"I know" she laughs, "Oh, I have not missed this smell. Or sight"

"Please, don't. No lecture. If I needed that, I would've called Joe. I just need help moving these wankers on"

She gasps. "These wankers are your friends"

"Piss off" I joke

"Love you too"


We begin waking up everyone. Luckily all the ones we found were still alive. No hole digging in the forest for us today.

"So why'd you do it?" she asks as she brews up a fresh batch of coffee

"I don't know, there was a fight, and then it kind of took off from there"

"You okay?"

"I'm fine, really" I shrug, pouring a big splash of bourbon into the coffee

She rolls her eyes at me.

"What, you know I don't drink this stuff any other way"

"So there was a fight..." she urges me on

"Joe punched Adam, Adam tackled Joe. It was a mess"

"Joe wouldn't do that"

"I don't know what's gotten into him. Urgh, I want to rip his head off"

"Who's? Joe's or Adam's?"

"Both. They are both idiots"

"You are marrying one of them"

"Yeah, I know. Am I an idiot for doing that?"

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