Just Your Average Bfdi Crackbook

Firey goes back in time

Firey: man im so bored being the main character of this shitty ass crackbook

Firey jr: then go back in time to stop it from being created

Firey: uh ok

*meanwhile*

Morty: To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Rick & Morty truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Rick's existential catchphrase "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Dan Harmon's genius wit unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools.. how I pity them. 😂And yes, by the way, i DO have a Rick & Morty tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand. Nothin personnel kid 😎

Rick: morty what the fuck are you talking about

Firey: uh hey rick and morty can i borrow your time machine

Ricky: uh sure why not

Morty: i have no bitches

Firey: *goes in the time machine*

1 second later

Firey: ah where the fuck am i

???: HELP ME IM DROWNING OH FUCKING CHRIST

Firey: *gasp* that man needs help

???: HELP ME FIRE MAN

Firey: lol k *helps him*

???: oh thank you so much

Firey: who the fuck are you anyway

Young hitler: hitler

Firey: *shoots the fuck out of him*

Firey: shit i went back too far. Welp. At least i killed hitler *runs the fuck away*

*1 nanosecond later*

Firey: holy shit im in my house

Past firey: I'm so fucking bored

(Lightbulb from II appear)

Normal firey: why the fuck did she just appear and disappear

Past firey: I know, I should go on the internet

Normal firey: DONT DO IT ME

Past firey: Woah! What the fuck?

Normal firey: DONT DO IT

Past firey: Why not?

Normal firey: because so much shit will go down, including, but not limited to, a huge war in November, TWO christmases, slamming your penis in the car door, you needing to pay your child support like 99999999999 times, among other goofy ahh shit

Past firey: But, Isn't it worth it at the end of the day? To be a part of the glorious planet Earth? To partake in these adventures? Tell me they are.

Normal firey: ew. Your capitalization and punctuation disgust me *shoots past firey 47 times in the chest*

Normal firey: haha take that bozo *starts disappearing* the fuck? It's like in back to the goddamn motherfucker bitch ass future

*goes to the beginning of this chapter* 

Past firey: man im so bored being the main character of this shitty ass crackbook

Firey jr: then go back in time to stop it from being created

Normal firey: DONT YOULL FUCKING DISAPPEAR

Past firey: oh ok i was actually lying so haha

Normal firey: i fucking hate myself

Leafy: hey firey you want some piss flavored water

Leafy: why the fuck are there 2 of you

Future firey: GUYS

Normal and past firey: *gasp* ANOTHER FIREY

Leafy: you know what? I can't do this anymore *shoots herself*

Future firey: ive come from the future to tell you past firey is still gonna go back to the future

Normal firey: why you son of a BITCH

Future firey: woah woah easy tiger you just need to destroy rick and morty's time machine

Normal firey: oh ok

*goes to almost the beginning of the chapter*

Rick: To be fair-

Firey: SHUT THE HELL UP *atomic bombs their time machine*

Rick: YOU SON OF A GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING BITCH ASS FUCKHOLE

Firey: cool

*goes back to normal*

Firey: ah. I'm glad everything is back to normal

*the world explodes for no reason*