Happily, you trod along your village, carrying a cupcake you bought from your favorite bakery. Today is your birthday, and you want to celebrate it. On the way home, you find your handsome boyfriend. Smiling, you hug him silently, and without either of you saying anything, he falls into stride with you. At your small apartment, you both sit on your small sofa and split the cupcake in half.
"Happy birthday, beautiful." He caresses your cheek and kisses you sweetly. When he pulls away, you ruffle his shaggy brunette hair, and stare into his emerald green eyes.
"Thanks for spending it with me."
"I dunno where else I'd spend it. At the grocery store?" You giggle.
"No. I guess not."
As you and your precious boyfriend split the cupcake, pale blue eyes stare at you two, jealousy almost burning a hole through the window. She's mine, idiot. Back off already.
-
Then, one day, you walk come, and see a trail of blood that goes into the kitchen. Eyes getting huge, you follow it, and there lies the body of the man you'd been calling your own. Above him stands another man, who is blonde with pale blue eyes and a light complexion. There is blood smeared all over him as he grins.
"Look, Y/nn! I killed him! Now he's out of our way!" Who even is he? Why is he here? Shaking, you back up until your back hits a wall.
"W- who are you?"
"Deidara! I've been waiting to officially meet you. Normally, I'd use my explosions to kill someone, but... he isn't worth my art. That's scum." He kicks the body out of the way and then comes closer to you, and rests his hand a bit above your head.
"W- why did you kill him? He and I were happy..." He frowns.
"I already told you: he was in the way. You're mine, okay?" He cups your cheek, and it gets wet with something you cannot recognize. He just chuckles a bit. "You'll have to ignore that. They... have a mind of their own." He moves it away and you find a mouth on it, and a tongue sticking out at you.
"THE HECK?!?!?!"
"My hands are special, eh? They chew detonating clay, which helps me with my art."
"Your art?"
Leaning closer to your ear, he whispers, "Clay sculptures that explode. I've wiped out entire villages with them." Shivers run down your spine as you break out into a cold swear. This guy is terrifying.
"Why would you do that...?"
"Because it's just so beautiful. Not as beautiful as you," he taps your nose. "But still beautiful. Ooh. I know. I'll blow yours up, too." He begins to laugh hysterically, and you panic.
"No! Don't! You'd kill everyone!"
"I know! It sounds so fun!"
"You're crazy! Leave them all alone!" He frowns again.
"You've no say in this, my little statuette." He leans in and kisses you, but you push him off.
"Don't touch me, you freak!" Visible anger crosses his face in a flash.
"Don't be so stubborn. I haven't any time for this. I need to get back to the base soon."
"Base?"
"I'm a member of the Akatsuki, Statuette. I need to get back to the base before Sasori gets angry."
"But-"
