Why do I feel this way?

Chapter 22: You, It Will Always Be You

As the nursing team sprints with Mia to the OR, one nurse stays behind, Renee. "Honey, don't worry. It's a common procedure, but it is urgent. She will be fine as soon as they repair her lung." She walks with me to the waiting room and leads me back to my friends. Marjorie rushed to hug me and I just lose it.

As Marjorie hugs me, I release all the emotion from what just occurred in the room with Mia. In the moment, I was shocked and worried, but once Marjorie wrapped me in a hug all the tension left.

Renee looks to Vivian and almost as if she was able to read her mind... "Her lung fully collapsed didn't it?" Renee slowly blinked and nodded. Vivian took in a deep breath as she began to explain to the crew what that would mean for Mia. They all let out a relieved sigh once the groups realized it was a routine procedure and would be fixed quickly. All taking a seat close to each other, they sat in silence for a while as each ones' mind wandered about their friends.

A few hours later, the surgeon that worked on Siobhan emerged from the double doors. His eyes slowly scanning for Vivian, after all he had worked with her many times in the ER. When he spotted her his chest rose quickly, taking a deep breath and walked to her. Marjorie, Charlotte and Reece stood to move closer to Vivian. Marjorie and Charlotte on either side of Vivian each one gently holding her hand. Reece stood by Marjorie as he placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. Winter and Autumn held hands, taking a moment to make eye contact before turning their attention to the doctor.

I'm trying to keep it together, trying to hold on to hope. When I spot Dr. Larrey, my chest hurts. My heart is racing. My eyesight shifts to a blur. I feel Marjorie and Charlotte take my hands and my body automatically calms. I have people here with me, for me. I'm not alone. I shut my eyes and say to myself... breathe Vivian... as I prepare myself to hear the doctor's words.

"Vivian, we were able to get the bleeding to stop. We found the source and repaired it. She lost a lot of blood. It was dicey for a little while. We had to shock her, but she is stable now. Do you want to come back to the room with her?" Vivian's eyes widened quickly, and with a hint of her usual lightheartedness, she said, "Seriously? Is that something you needed to ask?" Years in the ER had taught her to find humor, even in the gravest moments. She turns to each of the women by her side thanking them for their support as she follows the surgeon back to see Siobhan.

I can't wait to see her. Hold her. Hear her voice.

Vivian walks into her beautiful blonde's room and freezes for a moment. She runs her eyes across the entire length of Siobhan. She looks peaceful— like she is sleeping. Aside from the bruising and swelling in her face she doesn't even look hurt. Vivian slides the chair in the room directly beside the hospital bed. She places her hand in Siobhan's laying her head on the railing. "I love you Bon. Keep fighting. For me." As Vivian speaks, she feels Siobhan squeeze her hand. Tears flow from her eyes as she looks up. The younger woman hasn't opened her eyes yet, but Vivian knows she is going to be okay.

About an hour later, the anesthesia has mostly worn off and Vivian hears a soft whisper. She sees Siobhan's eyes fluttering as she finally opens them and looks at her gorgeous dark haired woman. "I love you, Viv." Vivian can't contain her emotions as she squeals, "Baby! I knew you would make it through!" leaning down to give a sweet kiss on her forehead. Siobhan's eyes began to water. "Viv, I heard you talking to me the whole time. I'm sorry you had to endure that, but thank you for reminding me why I had to live. You, it will always be you."

Meanwhile, in the waiting room, the doors burst open and Mia's surgeon strode in. His eyes scanned the room, landing on Charlotte...