Why do I feel this way?

Chapter 43: Keeper

The next morning at Vivian's, the couple were sitting in silence cuddling on the couch. Vivian sitting behind Siobhan one arm wrapped around her waist the other softly combing through her blonde locks. She was completely captivated by her. Everything around them seemed to vanish as her breathing slowed. Her trance was broken as Siobhan's voice faded in "Viv... Viv? Baby... are you okay?"

Vivian shook her head slightly as her face beamed with a smile and softly whispered, "Sorry, Bon. You are just so beautiful... I got lost for a while." At this admission, Siobhan's face burned bright red. She turned her body towards Vivian and ghosted her lips across hers. Softly breathed "I love you, Viv." before connecting their lips in a passionate kiss. Heat coursed through their bodies and minds were clouded like fog. The two felt as if they were spinning as they felt like they floated from the sofa in which they sat.

Although this is what I always wanted love to feel like, this feeling is so scary. It's what I've been waiting for my whole life, but I have to be vulnerable to feel it. It absolutely terrifies me.... But I trust Viv.

They slowly pull away from each other as Vivian's phone pings.

From Mom:
Hey Vivi, we will be leaving shortly to bring Jamie home. Do we need to grab dinner on the way?

To Mom:
Okay we will see you in about an hour. Siobhan and I are about to put lasagna in the oven for dinner. There will be plenty for all of us.

From Mom:
Okay darling. Jamie asks if Bon Bon will be there too... He has been talking about you two almost nonstop.

Vivian's heart nearly exploded hearing that Jamie had been talking about Siobhan as well as her. Kids can always sense things and Jamie could see the connection his mom had with Siobhan. She couldn't wait to have her baby boy home.

Finally, there was no more threat from Roger with him being gone. Vivian also knew that although she was somewhat unsettled about Bennie, he had boundaries he wouldn't cross. Bennie had an interesting respect for family structure, women and children.

The two women leapt from the sofa and entered the kitchen to start preparations for dinner. Siobhan was walking behind Vivian eyeing her up and down as she bit her lip she lightly swung her arm and smacked Vivian's ass. Vivian jumped with a small gasp escaping her mouth as she quickly turned on her heel to face Siobhan. "Ms. Serpent, I don't think you quite understand what you just did..." she said in a low sultry voice.

Vivian swiftly made her way to Siobhan, colliding their mouths together in a hungry kiss. She grabbed Siobhan's hips and continued to walk her back into the wall behind her. As her back slammed into the wall, Siobhan moaned while lifting her legs to wrap around Vivian. The brunette pulled away slightly, "Bon, we really need to focus. What is it about this kitchen that gets us into trouble?"

Siobhan let her legs drop to the ground as Viv held on to her so she didn't fall. She planted one more sweet kiss on the blondes lips then walked towards the stove. She turned her head to look over her shoulder at Siobhan, "don't think this little session is over... we just have to postpone it until after dinner."

I'm so in love with Vivian. How do I break through the walls I built when I was with Roger? I don't want to be what ruins what we have... And yet, my mind still drifts to the pills Bennie gave me. I shouldn't need them. I shouldn't even think about them.

The women stood on opposite ends of the island as they shared their excitement about Jamie coming home. Siobhan took out the ingredients for the salad to go with the lasagna. She began chopping up the veggies. She looked up and noticed Vivian biting her lip as she watched. "Viv, you need to behave yourself!" She narrowed her eyes at the blonde, "I can't help it. Your knife skills are sexy..." Siobhan rolled her eyes as she chuckled at her partner, "You need to calm down... get a cold water and chug it!" As she grabbed the water bottle she scoffed, "You are aware that you started all this, right?!"

Siobhan finished the salad and tossed it together in a large bowl to place on the table. Vivian took the lasagna out of the oven and set it next to the salad. The last thing to do was set out the plates for everyone. They laid the last plate down as they heard a knock at the door.

They're here... it's time to turn on the charm... wait... I don't have to do that anymore. Viv loves me for me and her family is nothing like Roger. Can I really be open with all of them?

Before Vivian could open the door completely two little hands pushed it the rest of the way open and wrapped his arms around his mom's legs. Laughter echoed through the home at the pure excitement radiating from Jamie. Siobhan leaned on the wall between the kitchen and the living room watching on as Vivian knelt down to hold her sweet boy.

Next thing she heard Jamie yell, "Bon Bon," as he barreled over wrapping her legs up in his arms. Vivian could feel her heart swelling as she saw the affection Jamie showed toward Siobhan. She was in no way prepared for her partner to pick Jamie up and wrap him in a loving embrace. She felt a knot form in her throat from the emotion flooding her. She felt her moms soft touch on her shoulder as she lifted her hand and placed it on hers. "Vivi, I think she is a keeper... and Jamie surely approves."

Beckett breaks the tender moment as he made his way through the doorway, "What are we having for dinner tonight?" Athena smacks her husband across his arm, "What did I do now?" His wife and daughter sigh and roll their eyes moving forward into the kitchen.

The family sat together eating, sharing stories and laughing. Siobhan was relaxed spending time with Viv's parents this time. A huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Jamie's bedtime came quickly and Vivian excused herself briefly to take him to bed.

Beckett turned to Siobhan, "So, it's over huh?" as he flashed a bright smile. Athena placing a comforting hand on Siobhan's. "It's such a relief to know you don't have to worry about him anymore. Now you three can be a happy little family." Tension crumbled in Siobhan's body as she absorbed the words Athena spoke. Quiet sobs escaped her mouth as tears trickled from her eyes.

"Mom, dad... What did you do? Why is Siobhan crying?" The blonde waved her hand at Viv as if to say it okay. "Baby, it's okay. They just helped me realize that we can truly start our lives together... no more worrying about us being harmed." Vivian smiles softly as she walked over and hugged Siobhan. "That's right... we can love without walls now."

That's my hope anyway...