Why do I feel this way?

Chapter 68: Cherished

Mia and Charlotte darted around the corner into the kitchen as Vivian ended the call. Mia walked closer holding Charlotte's hand as she stood behind her. "Viv, what do you need us to do?" The brunette remained silent for a few minutes as she thought about how the women could help. Siobhan spoke up, "Could you two stay here tonight?" She turned to look at Vivian, "It would make me feel better since I'm going to have to do a little doctoring tonight." The blonde stroked her hair and kissed her on the temple letting out a small, quiet chuckle.

Charlotte gasped when she saw the ring on Siobhan's finger, "Um... the ring?!" Siobhan snapped her head up at Charlotte glaring slightly, "Really? You ask about it now?" The soft spoken woman just shrugs her shoulders scrunching her nose. "I'm sorry, okay! I just noticed it and was excited for you two. I just wanted to hear it from you." The blonde rolls her eyes playfully before seeking Vivian's approval to share, "Well to answer your question... We are engaged!" Siobhan laid her head against Vivian's shoulder as she whispered, "my fiancé..." She loved how that sounded and felt like she'd never get tired of saying it— until she could call her wife.

Siobhan stood and assisted Vivian up the stairs. She has sobered up some due to the shock of Chris showing up at the hospital, but wasn't fully steady on her feet. The brunette's arm was draped across Siobhan's shoulder as the blonde gripped onto her waist with one hand and held Vivian's hand with the other. Mia and Charlotte followed them up the stairs to get ready to sleep in the guest bedroom.

The two friends were exhausted, so they climbed straight into bed. Charlotte slid her back flush against Mia's front as the redhead hung her arm over her waist. Charlotte intertwined her fingers with Mia's as she glided her hand into hers. "I love you, Amelia." The green eyed woman kissed Charlotte behind her ear as she whispered, "I love you, sweetheart." The two drifted off to sleep quickly wrapped tightly into the other.

In the master bedroom, Siobhan and Vivian sat next to each other at the end of the bed. "Bon, I feel so dirty... I hate myself for choosing to drink— and I hurt you." The blonde pulled Vivian close, "How about I help you shower? It will help you feel better." They walk together into the bathroom and as Vivian undresses Siobhan turns the knobs to get the water warm. The blonde undresses before taking Vivian's hand and leading her into the shower.

Siobhan treated Vivian so tenderly. She squeezed body wash onto a loofah before slowly and softly gliding it over Vivian's skin. The gentleness made Vivian feel loved and cherished. Siobhan wanted her to remember that she wasn't dirty and she should love herself. The blonde's eyes soaked in every inch of her fiancés body— memorizing every scar and freckle. Every piece of her told a story, a story in which Siobhan wanted to know every detail.

After washing her body, she motioned for Vivian to wet her hair. Vivian saw that Siobhan's eyes were locked onto her. "Baby, you're staring..." The blonde smiled, "You are the most beautiful person I have ever met. Inside and out— my fiancé." She pressed a soft kiss to her lips before turning to reach for the shampoo. Her fingers massaged Vivian's scalp thoroughly as the lather bubbled between her fingers.

The older woman was lost in her lover's touch. The moments of self hatred and regret washed away as she experienced the love Siobhan poured out on her. Tears of gratitude leaked from her eyes recognizing the rarity of their deep connection. Siobhan rinsed Vivian's hair gliding her fingers through her soft brunette locks. "How do you feel, Sunshine?" Vivian's heart skipped a beat as a small smile breaks through, "Loved, I feel loved, Bon. Thank you, baby..."

Siobhan stepped out of the shower quickly wrapping a towel around her as she grabbed Vivian's towel. As the brunette steps out, the younger woman envelopes her in the soft towel. She held her close for a few minutes just listening to each other breathe, feeling each other's heartbeat. It felt as if they were becoming one— devotion seeping into the other.

The two slipped into their pajamas and curled up together under the covers. Siobhan pressed her body against Vivian's back as she whispered, "Could you face me?" The brunette turned slowly looking into Siobhan's eyes and brushing her golden hair behind her ear. "You are my everything, Viv. I promise I will be by your side even when you are at your worst. I've never loved anyone like I love you." Vivian brushes her lips against Siobhan's before kissing her gently. As she pulled back she teased, "Wow, Bon. It's not quite time to share our vows." She winks and the blonde blushes, "Shut it, Viv!" smacking her playfully on the arm. The atmosphere feels light as they cuddle into each other and after a short silence they both drift off.

The next morning Vivian began to stir and feels something tucked behind her ear. A grin pulls at her lips until she holds it before her and recognizes it. The flower Chris would always buy her, a black dahlia. Fear ripples through her and a shiver radiates through her spine.