Why do I feel this way?

Chapter 84: Timeless

Surgery was going to plan— until it wasn't. The reason the surgeon didn't want to do the surgery without plenty of blood available became clear. Once they began to repair the damage, the adhesions caused by the heated knife began to make the walls of the surrounding blood vessels to tear. They called a second surgeon in to assist with repairing all the tears that were appearing. Siobhan was losing blood fast and they had the units of blood constantly coming.

At the moment, they were still able to perform laparoscopically, but if an artery were to tear they would have to open her up quickly. The tension was thick as each person was focused on their part of the delicate process. Each surgeon had a surg nurse watching their screen intently, scanning for any bleeders that hadn't been addressed yet. The silence was heavy, only broken by intentional communication towards saving Siobhan's life.

Tabby's only job during the surgery was to replace the units of blood while Renee watched her vitals for any concerning fluctuations. As Tabby exited the operating room once again running to retrieve another unit, Vivian caught a glimpse of her charging down the hallway. When Tabby was returning to the operating room, Vivian asked quietly, "how many units are left, Tab?" Her friend's head dropped slightly before she responded, refusing to stop moving forward. "Five, Viv. We have five." The brunette's breath hitched in her chest as a shaky whisper escaped, "she has to make it, Tabby." An involuntary sob breaking through her lips as an even quieter whisper breathed into the air, "I need her."

Vivian shuffled back toward the waiting room, where the others sat in quiet support. Charlotte rested her head on Mia's shoulder as they whispered to one another. Marjorie sat silently, typing a message to Reece. Autumn stood by the window, threading her fingers together anxiously. Athena had taken Beckett back to his room to rest and was just returning when she noticed her daughter's tense posture.

Athena made her way past the others, pausing in front of Vivian and gently taking her hands. "Honey, you have to stay positive. Your wife is strong..." Athena chuckled lightly, "and very stubborn— like somebody else I know." A gentle smile curls Vivian's lips as the vision of her beautiful blonde in her wedding dress flashes in her mind. "You're right." She turns her gaze to Mia and walks away with a steady expression that was missing before. "Mia, you remember that ring I told you about? The one Siobhan picked out for me..." The redhead's eyes widened as she remembered the conversation they had a couple weeks ago. "Can you go pick it up for me?"

A slow, understanding smile spread across Mia's face. She knew what Vivian needed—a tangible reminder that Siobhan was still hers, still fighting. Mia pulls Charlotte up with her walking with a sense of urgency to the car park. The two walk hand in hand as Charlotte speaks hesitantly, "they have been through so much together. Do you think they'll make it?" The redhead sighs as she unlocks the car and lowers herself into the seat throwing her hands in her lap. "Char, they have to... but all this trauma— it takes a toll." The two women take a deep breath before leaving the hospital once again, but this time to retrieve the one thing that gives Vivian something to hold on to while her love is fighting for her life.

When they laid eyes on the 1920s deco-style diamond ring, a lump grew in their throats. Tears threatened to spill as they imagined Siobhan choosing it — picturing Vivian's hand adorned with something so timeless, so full of meaning. The thoughtfulness Siobhan and Vivian poured into every symbol of their love was unmistakable — romantic, intentional, and uniquely theirs.

Once Mia and Charlotte made it back to the hospital, they silently handed the ring over to Vivian watching as she placed the ring on her finger with a smile pulling at her lips. She released a relieved sigh as she stared for a few moments. Her finger traced the delicate design as she thought about Siobhan. It almost felt like the blonde was holding her hand, grounding her like her touch so often did. Then, Tabby came bursting through the double doors yelling across the room, "Viv!" She waved her arm with urgency motioning for Vivian to come with her. The brunette snaps out of her peaceful daze and sprints through the double doors with Tabby.

The five women left in the waiting room felt their hearts drop into their stomach knowing something must be wrong. They all sit close together holding hands hoping that Siobhan pulls through this surgery. When Tabby and Vivian reach the operating room the machines are beeping aggressively, Vivian walks calmly to the head of the operating table. She leans down, whispering softly in Siobhan's ear, "baby, you have to stay with me... hold on." Vivian closes her eyes, breathing deeply as her mum's words replay through her head. "We have a little boy waiting for us at home. We have a honeymoon to plan and take— a whole life of love to spend together. I want all of that with you, Bon... but I need you to keep fighting."

Although Siobhan lay still and under anesthesia, she could hear her wife's voice clearly. Viv... I'm not leaving you. I have everything I ever wanted with you— I'll never stop fighting to be with you. I'm still here...

The sounds of the machines slowed showing Siobhan's vitals were returning back to normal. The surgeons had repaired the last vessel and she was no longer bleeding. Tabby hung another unit of blood— the last unit. The surgery was a success and Siobhan was completely stable. Tears flowed from Vivian's eyes as the tension released from her body. Her trembling whisper reached Siobhan's ear, "you did it, baby. You won— we won."

I love you, Viv. I can't wait to see you when I wake up— my wife.

Vivian stayed in the recovery room with Siobhan holding her hand tightly, her gaze shifting between her ring and her beautiful wife's face. After an hour, the blonde began to stir as a faint whisper left her lips. "Viv..." The brunette sits up and brings one hand up to Siobhan's forehead, softly dragging her fingers through her hair. "Welcome back, Bon. I—" The blonde cut her off with her raspy tired voice, "Viv, just hush and kiss me."

The older woman chuckled as she rested her hand on Siobhan's cheek gliding her thumb gently across her skin. She leans in kissing her wife so tenderly and purposefully. The blonde brings her hand to Vivian's, feeling a ring that wasn't there before. Their fingers intertwined as Vivian pulled away. Siobhan felt her eyes burn as tears welled up, "When... how?" Her voice trembled as her fingers brushed against the cool band. Vivian smiled softly as she breathed, "I needed to feel you with me." She rested her forehead against Siobhan's, "I couldn't lose you."