heart like yours (jennifer jareau)

4. eighteen

AN: happy monday!

i actually don't think there's any trigger warnings for the first time in like two seasons :)

i hope you guys enjoy! <333

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"to love and lose and still be kind." - warsan shire

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Delilah officially had a twelve year old.

She felt sick, if she was honest.

Mason wasn't the oldest of her kids, even if his birthday was the first in the year to come out of the four of them. Sunny's was on the 26th April, the Taurus that she was, and she would be thirteen this year if she were alive. Albie's was the 22nd of June, and he would be turning twelve this year too if he were alive.

And then Henry was almost five months old now, which was crazy, too.

The fact of the matter was; it would be five years without her first babies on the 23rd of June. They died the day after Albie's seventh birthday. And, in just a year, Delilah had gone from refusing to even acknowledge their existence to not only acknowledging their existence but raising two other children, as well.

Her favourite part about being a parent was that none of the children were actually hers biologically. It made it a lot easier to be a mom when they weren't from her bloodline. She would never be able to love something that had her blood when she hated herself so much.

She loved her kids, though, and she'd never celebrated one of their birthdays with them before. She knew Mason probably didn't have the best birthday memories growing up and she wanted to make it special for him. JJ was on the same page.

So, if the two of them stayed up for most of the early hours of Wednesday to bake and decorate Mason's birthday cake, it was nobody's business but their own.

He wanted a car themed birthday cake, especially since he'd started watching Formula One with Ziggy and Colin on Sundays. Delilah enjoyed watching with them, too, and she was looking to get tickets for the four of them to go and see a race in person, probably in Monaco because that was hers and Colin's favourite race to watch.

It would probably turn into the whole family going, but that would be more fun. It was a problem for later in the year, though.

The cake turned out better than JJ thought it would, which made Delilah laugh as she put it in the fridge until after school. They were having a family get together tonight, considering they all lived within five minutes of each other, but he would be going to the mall over the weekend with his friends to celebrate.

Delilah would be there to supervise from afar with Will, because, odds were, JJ would be on a case before Saturday.

They were just grateful JJ was here for Mason's actual birthday.

As in, Delilah was grateful. JJ seemed to be the emotional one today.

As in, she burst into tears the moment their alarm went off.

Will had spent the night and had said he'd handle Henry in the morning so they could focus on Mason, which was great, because Delilah didn't think she could deal with a fussy baby and a crying JJ at the same time.

She could barely deal with a crying JJ because JJ didn't like to cry. She rarely cried, even with the hormones since Henry.

"What's wrong?" Delilah asked, sitting up and trying to reach for JJ, who swatted her hand away.